Question
I need to clear up the doubts of the Muslim youth. Many of them are asking me if it really is unlawful to have sex with someone if they agreed. Please give me some advise on what to tell them.
Answer
Our religion has determined the lawful relationships between men and women and prepared for them the reasons which guarantee their happiness in this world and the Hereafter.
Allah forbids any relationship between a man and woman outside the marital relationship. We are, in fact, ordered in the Qur’ân to lower our gaze from the opposite sex, so how can we manage to go further and have such an intimate relationship as a love or a sexual relationship?
Allah says: “Say to the believing men that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts; that is purer for them; surely Allah is Aware of what they do. And say to the believing women that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts and do not display their ornaments except what appears thereof, and let them wear their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their ornaments except to their husbands or their fathers, or the fathers of their husbands, or their sons, or the sons of their husbands, or their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or the male servants not having need (of women), or the children who have not attained knowledge of what is hidden of women; and let them not strike their feet so that what they hide of their ornaments may be known; and turn to Allah all of you, O believers! so that you may be successful.” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 30-31]
Any form of sexual relationship between man and woman outside marriage is fornication. Allah says: “Nor come nigh to fornication: for it is an indecent (deed) and an evil way” [Sûrah al-Isrâ’:32].
Allah says, regarding His true believers: “Those who invoke not, with Allah, any other god, nor slay such life as Allah has made sacred except for just cause, nor commit fornication; - and any that does this deserves punishment.” [Sûrah al-Furqân: 68]
Moreover, those who engage in fornication and do not repent are the most maligned of people. Allah says: “The adulterer cannot marry any but an adulteress or an idolatress, and the adulteress, none mary her but an adulterer or an idolater; to the believers such a thing is forbidden” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 3]
Allah says: “The woman and the man guilty of fornication flog each of them with a hundred stripes. Let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day: and let a party of the believers witness their punishment” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 2].
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “The fornicator does not commit fornication while he is a believer” [Sahîh al-Bukhârî and Sahîh Muslim]
A young man once came to our Prophet (peace be upon him) and said: “O, Messenger of Allah give me a permission to commit fornication.”
The Companions were angry with the way that young man who dared to ask such a thing from the Prophet (peace be upon him), but the Prophet (peace be upon him) did not grow angry and immediately asked him: “Would you like a man to fornicate with your mother?”
The young man replied: “No.”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Hence other people do not like it for their mothers. Would you like it for your daughter?”
The man said: “No.”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Hence people do not like it for their daughters....” [Musnad Ahmad]
Allah forbids any relationship between a man and woman outside the marital relationship. We are, in fact, ordered in the Qur’ân to lower our gaze from the opposite sex, so how can we manage to go further and have such an intimate relationship as a love or a sexual relationship?
Allah says: “Say to the believing men that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts; that is purer for them; surely Allah is Aware of what they do. And say to the believing women that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts and do not display their ornaments except what appears thereof, and let them wear their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their ornaments except to their husbands or their fathers, or the fathers of their husbands, or their sons, or the sons of their husbands, or their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or the male servants not having need (of women), or the children who have not attained knowledge of what is hidden of women; and let them not strike their feet so that what they hide of their ornaments may be known; and turn to Allah all of you, O believers! so that you may be successful.” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 30-31]
Any form of sexual relationship between man and woman outside marriage is fornication. Allah says: “Nor come nigh to fornication: for it is an indecent (deed) and an evil way” [Sûrah al-Isrâ’:32].
Allah says, regarding His true believers: “Those who invoke not, with Allah, any other god, nor slay such life as Allah has made sacred except for just cause, nor commit fornication; - and any that does this deserves punishment.” [Sûrah al-Furqân: 68]
Moreover, those who engage in fornication and do not repent are the most maligned of people. Allah says: “The adulterer cannot marry any but an adulteress or an idolatress, and the adulteress, none mary her but an adulterer or an idolater; to the believers such a thing is forbidden” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 3]
Allah says: “The woman and the man guilty of fornication flog each of them with a hundred stripes. Let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day: and let a party of the believers witness their punishment” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 2].
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “The fornicator does not commit fornication while he is a believer” [Sahîh al-Bukhârî and Sahîh Muslim]
A young man once came to our Prophet (peace be upon him) and said: “O, Messenger of Allah give me a permission to commit fornication.”
The Companions were angry with the way that young man who dared to ask such a thing from the Prophet (peace be upon him), but the Prophet (peace be upon him) did not grow angry and immediately asked him: “Would you like a man to fornicate with your mother?”
The young man replied: “No.”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Hence other people do not like it for their mothers. Would you like it for your daughter?”
The man said: “No.”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Hence people do not like it for their daughters....” [Musnad Ahmad]
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