Islam
Sunday, 3 April 2016
How to maintain a healthy home
Chapter 36, Ya Sin (Ya Sin)
Introduction
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The 36th chapter of the Quran is entitled Ya Sin. It is named after the first two letters of the chapter which are "ya" and "sin" (pronounced seen). Thus it cannot be translation into English and is always left untranslated. This chapter of 83 verses was revealed in Mecca and as with all the Meccan chapters, it focuses primarily on the belief in the Oneness of God and the consequences of either believing or disbelieving in that basic principle. Chapter Ya Sin has many short verses and its recitation with short pauses is very emotional. Verses 1 - 12 The revelation of the Quran is a warning to humankind
God swears by the wise Quran that Prophet Muhammad, may the mercy and blessings of God be upon him, is indeed a messenger on the straight path sent to warn those who are unaware. The Quran is full of wisdom, and those who do not follow its guidance are indeed unfortunate. However only those who believe in God and fear His punishment will take heed of the warning. God keeps a clear record of everything.
Verses 13 – 29 The example of the three messengers
Prophet Muhammad is told to warn the people using the example of the three messengers. Two who were sent to the people and then a third to strengthen their number yet still the people refused to believe. The messengers revealed themselves and issued a warning but they were called liars and threatened with stoning. A man ran from the other side of the town saying listen, they do not want a reward. Listen to the message he pleads but he is killed by the disbelievers and thus abruptly finds himself in heaven. Still he wishes the people knew of the forgiveness and mercy of God. God did not send an army against the people, nor was He about to. He just sent one heavenly blast and they fell down, lifeless.
Verses 30 – 40 Those who deny the resurrection fail to the signs
Alas for humankind says God, they ridicule the messengers and they do not see just how many generations have been destroyed before them. None of them will ever come back yet all of them will come back to stand before God. They deny the Resurrection yet there are signs everywhere. God gives life to the lifeless earth. There is produce and springs of fresh water. They have not produced these things themselves so why are they not grateful. All glory is for God who created all species in pairs, and humankind itself and many other things that humankind knows nothing about. As well as many things that humankind no nothing about. It is God who strips away the daylight transitioning day into night. The sun runs on a fixed course and the moon waxes and wanes according to God’s command. The sun does not reach the moon and the night does not overtake the day because God has determined the course on which they run.
Verses 41 - 51 Reminders and warnings
As a reminder God refers to the Flood and how our ancestors were carried in the ark. God continued to create the means with which to traverse the sea and if He willed, the people would be drowned and He would not respond to their cries. They would not be saved except as a mercy from God. We are warned to beware of what lies before and what lies behind. This is a reference to our behaviour in this world and our abode in the Hereafter. Perhaps there will be mercy; perhaps we will not heed the warning. The signs come but the disbelievers turn away. When they are told to give generously out of what has been provided to them they mock the messengers and say why should we feed those whom God could easily provide for. They arrogantly ask "when will this promise (meaning the Resurrection) be fulfilled" but alas a single blast (sometimes translated as shout) will overtake them while they are still arguing. Then the trumpet will be blown signalling the Resurrection.
Verses 52 – 58 A scene from the Day of Resurrection
The people will ask who has raised us from our sleeping place (generally agreed to be the grave) and they will be told that this is the promise made to you by the Most Merciful (God) and what the messengers warned about. It will be but one single blast and lo and behold, all of humankind will be brought before God. On that Day no one will be wronged, everyone will be recompensed for what they did; all will be repaid for their deeds. The people of Paradise will be rewarded handsomely; they will be with their spouses seated on couches in the shade. They will have therein all kinds of fruits and whatever they wish for. And in addition to this their Lord will greet them with "peace".
Verses 59 – 65 God addresses the disbelievers
Then God will say, stand apart you criminals. Remove yourselves from the ranks of the believers so that you are distinguishable from them. God says, "Did I not enjoin upon you, O children of Adam, that you not worship Satan – for he is a clear enemy to you. And that you worship [only] Me?" This is a straight path, says God and he (Satan) has led great numbers of you astray, could you not use your reason to see this? The disbelievers are told to enter Hellfire because of what they denied and refused to believe and because they refused to heed God’s commands. God will seal their mouths but their hands and feet will speak and bear witness to all.
Verses 66 – 76 The Quran is a warning, a gauge between right and wrong
God could have left humankind without guidance but because of His mercy he did not. They could have been left blind without the means to see, or deformed without the means to move either forward or backward but He did not. Prophet Muhammad is not a poet; he was not given mere poetry; rather, he was given a clear book of guidance, the Quran. It is a warning, so that God’s judgment can be passed according to it. God then informs us of one of the many blessings He has bestowed upon us: livestock. He created it for our general use, to be used as a means of transportation, for food and milk, and for other benefits. Instead of giving thanks to God for this blessing, the disbelievers have taken other deities besides God for worship and even call upon them for help but they cannot help! Even an entire army of false gods combined cannot help in the least. God tells Prophet Muhammad not to be distressed at what they say because He (God) knows what they reveal and what they conceal.
Verses 77 – 83 The Creator is the Only One to bring back to life
Humankind seems to forget their origin so God reminds us that we were created from a drop of fluid. Yet even then they dispute openly asking who could give life back to bones after they have decayed? God says that the One who gave them life in the first place will bring them back; it is only He who has knowledge of every act of creation. It is He who produced fire so that humankind can benefit from it; it is He who created the heavens and the earth so is it not then easy for Him to bring back the people? Of course it is! When God wills something to be, He says "Be" and it is. All glory belongs to God, who controls everything and it is to Him that humankind will be resurrected. -islamreligion.com
Saturday, 2 April 2016
The distorted image of Muslim women
Since the height of the feminist movement in the late 70's there has been a magnifying glass placed over the status of Muslim women. Unfortunately, the magnifying glass that has been used is an unusual one.
Unusual in the sense that it is very selective about which items it will magnify; other items it will distort to such a degree that they will no longer look familiar. I remember once reading an "in depth" article about the lives of Muslim women. This article "explained" that at any time a man can divorce his wife by simply stating "I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you".
This article can lead anyone ignorant of the Islamic ruling regarding divorce to believe that in less than five seconds the woman is left with no husband and is left to care for herself (and possibly children) by any means necessary.
The question that immediately popped up in my mind was, "Did the author innocently write that out of sincere ignorance or was it another of the many attempts to degrade the religion of Islam and its followers (Muslims)?" It may be out of paranoia, but I tend to believe it was the latter of the two.
The truth of the matter is that Islam has the most humane and most just system of divorce that exists. Firstly, many options are taken and tried before coming to the decision of divorce. If the man and woman decide that they can no longer live together successfully as a husband and wife, the husband (in most cases, not always) pronounces the divorce by saying "I divorce you". At this point the waiting period begins.
The waiting period lasts for three menstrual cycles to assure the woman is not pregnant. This period allows the couple time to think about what they are doing and if this is what they really want to do. There are no lawyers involved to antagonize an already delicate situation.
In the case that it is realized, that the woman is pregnant, the waiting period lasts the entire time she is pregnant. During the waiting period (whether the woman is pregnant or not) the man is obligated to provide food, clothing and shelter to the woman as he did before the divorce pronouncement.
If the couple carries the divorce through to the birth of the child and the woman suckles the baby, the man is obligated to feed and clothe both his ex-wife for the time the woman suckles (the maximum being two years). After his weaning, the child will be provided for by the father until he/she is no longer in need of support.
It is quite ironic that in such an "advanced society" as America, there are divorce cases in which women are being forced to pay alimony to their ex-husbands. Can this and many other things we know about the American system of divorce compare to the Islamic system of divorce?
I have also read stories wherein it is stated that women are forced to marry men without their consent. This in no way resembles the marriage system in Islam. In Islam the woman marries the man of her choice. She may even marry someone that her mother and/or father objects to.
The point is that it is the woman who makes the final decision as to whom she will marry. Once the man and the woman decide that they are interested in one another for marriage, a dowry is decided upon. A dowry is not a bride’s price but it is a gift from the groom to the bride.
They agree upon a gift that is affordable by the groom. In the time of the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam , often things such as livestock and money were given. This is a wise decision in the event that a woman becomes divorced or widowed, she has some financial security to fall back on even if it is for a limited amount of time. Once the man and woman are married, the man is required to clothe, feed, shelter and educate her (or allow her to be educated) in the same manner as he does himself.
The last distorted image that I will cover is that of the Muslim women's dress. The western-influenced media portrays our dress to be outdated and oppressive. Needless to say, I differ with these adjectives. Our dress code does not hinder us from doing anything productive in our lives.
Muslim women maintain a variety of jobs, none of which are devalued nor hampered due to their dress code. And as for the timing of Muslim women's dress during these contemporary times, it seems most appropriate due to decreasing morals in the world today.
For those who say that Islamic dress is outdated, they speak from great ignorance. The decreasing morality and trials of this time makes Hijab even more in need. More than ever before sex crimes are rampant.
Although this society tells women they can wear what they want to wear, anytime a rape occurs the woman is the one put on trial and one of the first questions is, "What were you wearing?" This concept seems as though it is a set up directed against the so-called contemporary woman. Also there is a direct correlation between the respect a man has for a woman and the amount of her body she displays flauntingly.
In conclusion, I hope this article helps to clear up some distorted/misunderstood aspects of Islam and women. Women in Islam are respected and held in high regard. We will never find success and/or solutions to our problems until we realize that Allaah knows best and that this disbelieving society will ruin itself. -islamweb.net
It is quite ironic that in such an "advanced society" as America, there are divorce cases in which women are being forced to pay alimony to their ex-husbands. Can this and many other things we know about the American system of divorce compare to the Islamic system of divorce?
Everything in the Universe tends to be Covered
Allah The Almighty safeguarded the Earth with the atmosphere before women lived on it wearing Hijab (Islamic covering). The Earth with its atmosphere; all types of living cells; and all parts of the plants ranging from seeds to fruits – are all covered.
A caterpillar starts its life in a cocoon; the skin covers the organs; a corpse is shrouded in white pieces of cloth; and then buried under the earth, men and women alike.
Inanimate objects are veiled:
A sword is kept in its sheath. When a pen loses its cap; its ink dries up; it becomes useless and is thrown away to be trodden on, because it lost its cap, which is the source of its protection. Why do our children bind their books and notebooks? Is it to waste time or to protect them? You put your head on a pillow which is kept clean because of its case that protects it from dirt.
Living beings are veiled:
The cell is surrounded with double membranes, inside and outside, to protect it and regulate the activity of its components.
• The plant cell
It is surrounded by a thick wall which supports it even after death.
• The animal cell
Vertebral cells exist in holes; bone cells are located in tubes; the female ova is kept in the ovaries; the neurons (nerve cells) are long and sheathed, so that they are protected from damage and being cut. Every cell has its own cover; similarly, a woman has to have her distinctive cover (Hijab).
Plants are veiled:
• The seed
Soil is the veil of the seed; it shelters the seed from the sunshine. The seed lives in darkness in order to grow. The shell is a second cover followed by a third one. The root has a growing top covered by a cap whereby the root penetrates the soil.
Deep soil is better for the seed than the surface. Similarly, when a woman covers herself, she rejects superficiality and thrives spiritually; when she discards her Hijab, she brings evil upon herself and spreads corruption among the Ummah (Muslim nation).
• The flower
The pistil is in the center of the blossom and is surrounded by petals that protect it. Allah The Almighty protects the pistil in this way. Is the woman not entitled to such protection? What are the means of this protection? Is not a woman who discards the Hijab like a beautiful flower, looking dazzling in her adornment, spreading her fragrance, and attracting all kinds of creatures towards it? But all flowers wither and mix with the dust – the difference is that the flower has no reckoning, but human beings do. Would you like this end?
• The fruit
Consider: What happens to an apple when you cut part of it and leave it? Why does a banana turn black after peeling it?
Animals are veiled:
• Sea animals
In the sea, we find various types of corals, shells and snails – all of them form covers to guard mollusks. Surely, blessed Is Allah, The Creator, The Originator and The Fashioner!
• Land animals
The butterfly passes through different stages of development. It receives a great command from the Allah The Almighty, that it carries it out. It secretes sticky threads, spins them, and weaves them to produce a veil for the developing pupae inside a cocoon.
If an unthinking creature obeys the orders of Allah the Almighty, then how can a woman who is favored with reason and logic disobey Allah The Almighty?
Reptiles have scales; a hedgehog has sharp spines; a turtle carries a big, heavy shell on its back throughout its life. A turtle has the heaviest veil that bears witness to its patience. Which woman has the most precious Hijab? A woman who spends a fortune on a showy, costly Hijab which itself needs to be covered with another Hijab in order to be Islamically acceptable; or the modest garb of a woman who desires the dress of Paradise?
Covers vary from one animal to another, and they may vary among the same species according to the needs of the animal.
Young birds are protected by the fragile shell of the egg that can easily break. So, women should not claim that Hijab is merely a piece of cloth, for this piece of cloth is sufficient to protect you – Allah willing. Eggs hatch, letting chicks come out with light fluffy hair which later develop into long feathers that protect the bird.
Humans are veiled:
Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {He creates you in the wombs of your mothers, creation after creation, within three darknesses.} [Quran 39:6]
• The fetus in its mother's womb
The fetus remains safe in its mother's womb for nine months, and the womb is surrounded by membranes and layers. The three types of darkness are: darkness of the placenta, darkness of the womb's wall, and darkness of the walls of the belly.
These membranes provide the fetus with comfort, security, food and oxygen.
• Veils in the man's body
The diaphragm exists in the body and separates the heart and the lungs from the rest of the organs. It perfectly performs its function because it is thick, and neither light nor transparent.
On the contrary a woman’s Hijab nowadays is light and revealing the details of the body. Not only is the woman's Hijab transparent, but it is also revealing – as if it were designed to allure, not to conceal – thus, belying its very purpose.
• The skeleton
It consists of a hard, protective skull where the brain is located. The brain is the man's treasure, because it is the site of the mental faculties which distinguish him from animals, and it is located securely inside a bony container. A skillful doctor's lancet cannot reach it except after sawing the skull. It is a mighty safe given to the rich and the poor, and is similar to an iron safe where precious jewels are kept. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {…And in yourselves. Then will you not see?} [Quran 51:21]
• The heart
The heart is like a gift wrapped in multiple layers. There are five soldiers guarding it: the pericardium, which is light; two soft lungs surrounding it; a breastbone securely containing them; muscles and tissues garmenting the breastbone; all of which is covered with protective skin. Likewise, the mercy, love and wisdom of our Lord encircles us, so He legislated Hijab for us.
• The eye
The eye is the most valuable item man possesses. It is like a ball that fits in the eye sockets to protect it from injury. A woman, like the eye, puts on Hijab to guard herself from being exploited as a sex object. People who misuse the faculties granted by Allah The Almighty start with an unlawful look at a non-Mahram (marriageable) woman, followed by a smile, then a greeting, then a conversation, then a date, then a meeting, then impermissible exposure of adornments and free intermixing. The result usually is committing unlawful sex, diseases, shame, destruction, and finally torment in Hell. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {Tell the believing men to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for them.} [Quran 24:30]
• The skin
The skin is a thick tissue which covers the body entirely and hides the bones, muscles, blood vessels, and so on. Let the woman imagine: If the skin had been transparent and showing what is under it, what would people have looked like? Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {We have certainly created man in the best of stature.} [Quran 95:4]
You sterilize the wounds on your skin in order to protect your body; however, Hijab protects both your body and soul. How could you carelessly and indifferently discard it? With your Hijab, you are a representative of Islam, a role model for others, and a guide for the whole world to the existence of a great religion.
With Hijab, you are a protected jewel, and without it, you are like a sweet left uncovered for flies to land on. Are you a commodity for sale, or a corpse on which bacteria and worms gather? No. By Allah, you are a well-protected pearl.
So, put on your Hijab, because everything in the Universe is covered. Do not behave at odds with laws of the Universe, for deviation leads to The Fire. -islamweb.net
Friday, 1 April 2016
Keys to Happiness
 Happiness is the only goal on earth that all people without exception are seeking to attain. Believers and unbelievers alike seek to be happy, but each party is using different methods.
However, only believers can achieve genuine happiness. All forms of happiness attained without a firm belief in God, the Almighty, are mere illusions.
The following are tips for the attainment of happiness:
1. Know that if you do not live within the scope of today, your thoughts will be scattered, your affairs will become confused, and your anxiety will increase. These realities are explained in the following hadith:
“When you are in the evening, do not expect to see the morning, and when you are in the morning, do not expect to see the evening.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)
2. Forget the past and all that it contained, focus on the present.
3. Do not completely preoccupy yourself with the future and then discard the present. Be balanced in life, prepare yourself adequately for all situations.
4. Do not be shaken by criticism; instead, be firm. Be sure that in proportion to your worth, the level of people's criticism rises. Also, make good use of criticism in discovering your shortcomings and faults, and let it drive you toward self-improvement.
5. Have complete faith in God and perform good deeds; these are the ingredients that makeup a good and happy life.
6. If you desire peace, tranquility, and comfort, you can find it all in the remembrance of God.
7. You should know with certainty that everything that happens, occurs in accordance with the divine decree.
8. Do not expect gratitude from anyone.
9. Train yourself to be prepared for the worst possibility.
10. Perhaps what has happened is in your best interest, even though you may not comprehend how that can be so.
11. Everything that is decreed for the believer is the best for him.
12. Enumerate the blessings of God and be thankful for them.
13. Remember that you are better off than many others.
14. Relief comes from one hour to the next. Indeed, with each difficulty there is relief.
15. In both times of hardship and ease, one should turn to supplication and prayer, either patiently contented or thankful.
16. Calamities should strengthen your heart and reshape your outlook in a positive way.
17. Do not let trivialities be the cause of your destruction.
18. Always remember that your God is Oft-Forgiving.
19. Assume an easy-going attitude and avoid anger.
20. Life is bread, water, and shade; so do not be perturbed by a lack of any other material thing.
“And in the heaven is your providence and that which you are promised.” (Quran 51:22)
21. A daunting evil that seemingly will happen usually never occurs.
22. Look at those who have more afflictions and be grateful that you have less.
23. Bear in mind the fact that God loves those who endure trials with steadfastness, so seek to be one of them.
24. Constantly repeat those supplications that the Prophet, may the mercy and blessings of God be upon him, taught us to say during times of hardship.
25. Work hard at something that is productive, and cast off idleness.
26. Do not spread rumors and do not listen to them. If you hear a rumor inadvertently, do not believe it.
27. Know that your malice and your striving to seek revenge are much more harmful to your health than they are to your antagonist.
28. The hardships that befall you atone for your sins, if you endure with patience.
-islamreligion.com
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The Impact of the Art of Listening and Understanding Between Spouses
All families have problems. Misunderstanding and lack of listening between the spouses occurs for one reason or another. However, there are various degrees of this, some of which are endurable and considered normal in all families, whereas others are agonizing and abnormal. The latter leads to family disintegration and the breaking of its tight chain, but this does not happen in all families. Undoubtedly, where there is smoke, there is fire and there is a medicine for every disease. When the disease is diagnosed, it would be easy to prescribe the medicine. Mutual understanding between the spouses plays a great role in maintaining a stable marital life and has a significant effect in uprooting the causes of daily problems. Otherwise, the problem aggravates, inflates and is difficult to solve, which leads to unfavorable consequences.
Both spouses are required to be frank and clear and express their feelings with each other. Moreover, each of them should be understating and modest and be an open book for the other. It is hard to decide who bears the greater part of the responsibility here. The husband leaves his home and returns at the end of the day with his mind occupied by many things away from his home. He keeps thinking about many things that are related to his work and interrelated relations that the woman does not have. The wife, on the other hand, is overburdened with the tasks of her home, the rights of her husband and the hardship that she faces in raising her children. This is in addition to her nature where her reason is usually overpowered by emotion and, hence, she is affected by the least things. This is why the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, in more than one Hadeeth instructed that she should be kindly treated by men.
Indeed both the husband and the wife are responsible for this issue and each of them should give it due its attention if they want the ship to proceed and life to be stable. It is one form of association that Allah The Exalted commands in the Quran.
Had the wife known what occupies her husband's mind when he returns from work and how exhausted he is, she would have received him in the best way, wiped her hand over that tiredness and hardship, and opened her heart to contain his suffering and pain. He, therefore, would regain his energy, forget the tiredness that he feels and the effort that he exerted, and regain his energy as if he had not been exhausted in the first place. However, what actually happens is that she immediately receives him by telling him about what happened to her or her neighbors, or even what happened between her and her family as well as other hopes for the future, and this is not kind association. It is also not wise of her to hasten to talk to him at the time when he needs peace and tranquility.
Rather, she should listen to him and show great interest in everything that he says. When he takes his sufficient portion of rest, affection and love as well as affability and nearness, she can tell him anything she wants if she sees readiness in his eyes. In such a case, she will find an open heart and listening ears. It is not wise of the wife to talk when silence is required or keep silent when talking is required. She should take the Mother of the Believers, Khadeejah, may Allah be pleased with her, as her example. She never saw the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, troubled without doing her best to divert him, remove his worry and promote his energy and zeal.
In a Hadeeth on the authority of ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, she said,
When Jibreel [Gabriel], may Allah exalt his mention, revealed to the Messenger of Allah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, the beginning of Soorah Al-‘Alaq, he came back with it while his heart was pounding severely. He entered into the presence of Khadeejah bint Khuwaylid, may Allah be pleased with her, and said: ‘Cover me! Cover me!’They [his family] covered him until his fear subsided and after that he told her everything that had happened and said: ‘I feared that something might happen to me.’Khadeejah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, ‘Never! By Allaah, Allaah will never fail you. You maintain the ties of kinship, help the poor and the destitute, serve your guests generously and assist those who are afflicted with adversity.’ Khadeejah, may Allah be pleased with her, then accompanied him to her cousin Waraqah ibn Nawfal ibn Asad ibn ‘Abdul-‘Uzza……." [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]
Ibn Hajar, may Allah have mercy upon him, said, "From the benefits of this story is that it is recommended to relieve the person who is afflicted by adversity by diverting him and making it easy for him. It is also recommended for the person who is afflicted with an adversity to tell the one whose advice and sound opinion he trusts."
In a Hadeeth on the authority of Husayn ibn Mihsan, may Allah be pleased with him, he said that his aunt said to him. “I came to the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, for something, and he said: ‘O you, Do you have a husband?’‘Yes,’I replied. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, asked: ‘How do you treat him?’I replied, ‘I fulfill all his rights unless I am incapable of doing so.’ The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:‘You have to think about how you treat him for he is your Paradise and Hell.’”[Al-Haakim] The wife who knows this, when her husband gets angry with her, mistreats her or she disobeys him, she would say, “Here is my hand in your hand. I will not sleep unless you are satisfied with me.” When there is anger, she hastens to him and does not wait or try to discover who is wrong because the matter is greater than that - he is the reason for her entering either Paradise or Hell.
On his part, the husband should appreciate his wife’s suffering all day long at home with the children. He should be patient with her and realize that she has been waiting for him all day to tell him about how she feels. He should be a good listener and show interest in what she is interested in. If the husband understands the nature of women, he will know that talking is one of their desires, especially when it is related to something that concerns their lives.
Moreover, she washes his clothes, prepares his food, brings up his children and satisfies his desires. He has to take the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, as his example. In more than one place, he instructed that women should be kindly treated. This was even mentioned in the sermon of his Farewell Pilgrimage, the last advice the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, offered his Ummah (nation). The one who neglects this is actually neglecting the last advice of the Messenger of Allah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam. He gave us a good example when he sat listening to ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with him, while she was telling him about the story of Umm Zar‘ that included the conditions of eleven women with their husbands. In Saheeh Muslim, theHadeeth is mentioned in six full pages. At the end of the story, the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said to her: “I am for you as Abu Zar‘ was for Umm Zar’.” Although the story was very long and contained eloquent words, the Messenger of Allah,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, did not get bored and at the end said the words that pleased his wife and made her happy. This incident indicates that the Messenger of Allah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, was not assuming this manner pretentiously, but that it was actually part of his natural demeanor.
Commenting on the verse in which Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness.} [Quran 4: 19], Sayyid Qutb, may Allah have mercy upon him, said beautiful words in this respect. He said,
The Islam that believes the house to be a repose and a source of security and peace, and believes the marital relation to be a source of affection, mercy and affability and establishes this bond on absolute choice to be built on response, kindness and love, is the same Islam that addresses husbands by the content of the verse where Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.}[Quran 4:19] This is meant to preserve the tie of marriage from breaking with the first whim and to keep the seriousness of this important human institution so that it should not be subjected to the whim of one's unstable emotions and the ugliness of inclinations.
When there is understanding between the spouses and they both agree on a particular way for maintaining this understanding, and each of them is a good listener to the other and shows his interest in what the other is interested in, life becomes quiet and happy, mercy prevails, tranquility descends, affection surrounds it, and it becomes full of love and harmony. -islamweb.net
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