Islam

Islam

Monday, 11 December 2017

Ruling on name ‘Benazeer’

Image result for The name ‘Benazir’ is discouraged

Question

My name is Benazeer; some scholars said that my name does not have a good meaning and told me to change it. I am now called Sarah. I want to know whether Benazeer is a good name or not, and when I change my name, can I change it as Sarah Benazeer? Is it good?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.
We have come to know that this name means the unique one who has no equal or equivalent. If this is the case, then it seems to us – Allah knows best – that it is disliked to be named with it as it is an exaggeration and constitutes self-praise.
An-Nawawi  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said:
A widespread calamity that was reported in fatwas is to name a woman Sitt An-Naas (Lady of the people), Sitt Al-‘Arab (Lady of the Arabs), Sitt Al-Qudhaah (Lady of the judges), or Sitt Al-‘Ulama (Lady of the scholars) ... The answer is: It is intensely disliked; its dislike is derived from the meaning of the hadeeth: ‘The worst name (on the Day of Judgement) in the sight of Allah is that of a man who is called Malik Al-Amlaak (the king of kings).’ And the hadeeth of changing the name Barrah (pious) to Zaynab, and because it is a lie.
Therefore, you should change your name, and it is permissible to be named Sarah, but Sarah Benazeer is a return to the same prohibition, because its meaning would be Sarah that is unique, or that is unparalleled.
Allah knows best. -islamweb.net

Zakat (The Poor Due): Meaning, Ruling and Benefits

The literal meaning of "Zakat" is purity. Its Islamic technical meaning designates the annual amount of wealth, food, property etc. which a Muslim with the adequate means must distribute among the rightful beneficiaries.
Zakat is a remarkable institution and a major pillar of Islam. Allah, Almighty, Says (what means): "And establish the Prayer, and pay Zakat (the poor due)..." [Quran, 2:43]
Moreover, Zakat is an obligatory act because it is one of the pillars of Islam: The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: "Islam was built upon five (pillars): `The testimony that none has the right to be worshipped but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah; the establishment of the prayer; paying the obligatory charity (Zakat); pilgrimage to the House (Hajj to the Ka'bah in Makkah) and fasting (the month of) Ramadan."' [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
Zakat is a small portion of the Muslim's wealth that must be given to the poor or to other specified beneficiaries. Whoever claims that Zakat is not obligatory and refuses to pay it, is not a Muslim, but a Muslim who refuses to pay Zakat due to stinginess, while affirming its obligation, has committed a great sin for which one will be severely punished.
Allah, Almighty, Says (what means): "...and as for those who hoard treasures of gold and silver, and do not spend them for the sake of Allah, announce unto them a painful torment. On the Day when that [hoarded wealth] shall be heated in the Fire of Hell and with it will be branded their foreheads, their flanks, and their backs, (and it will be said unto them): `This is the treasure which you hoarded for yourselves. Now taste of what you used to hoard." [Quran 9: 34-35]
He, Almighty, also Says (what means): "And let not those who covetously withhold of that which Allah has bestowed on them of His bounty (wealth) think that it is good for them (and so they do not pay Zakat). No, it will be worse for them; the things which they covetously withheld will be tied to their necks like a collar on the Day of Resurrection..." [Quran 3:180]
There is no equivalent in any other language to the word "Zakat" and the meaning it conveys. It is not just a form of charity, or alms-giving or tax or tithe. Nor, is it simply an expression of kindness; it is all of these combined and much more. It is a duty enjoined by Allah and a source of purification for the individual and society as a whole.
He, Almighty, Says (what means): "Take from their wealth 'sadaqah' (Zakat) in order to purify them and sanctify them with it." [Quran 9: 103]
Zakat benefits the society in many ways. Here is an explanation of the far-reaching effects of it:
1. Zakat purifies the individual and his wealth. The status of his wealth is increased with Allah and in turn, he will be rewarded. When a person becomes liable for paying Zakat, a certain percentage of his wealth should be distributed immediately in the correct manner, because at that point, the wealth which is to be distributed does not belong to him. If this wealth is retained, it spoils the status of all of his wealth.
2. Zakat does not only purify the property of the one who gives it, it also purifies his heart from selfishness and greed. In return, it purifies the heart of the recipient from envy and jealousy, and it fosters in his heart good will and warm wishes toward the contributor. As a result, the rich and poor of society are bound together as a unit, working together and helping one another.
3. Zakat decreases the sufferings of the needy and poor members of society, however, those in need should not depend on it completely.
4. Zakat is an effective means of developing the spirit of social responsibility on the part of the well-to-do, and the feeling of security and belonging on the part of the underprivileged.
5. Zakat is a clear manifestation of the spiritual and humanitarian interactions between the individual and society. It is a sound illustration of the fact that though Islam does not hinder private enterprise or condemn private possessions, it does not tolerate selfish and greedy control of wealth and property. It is an expression of the general philosophy of Islam which adopts a moderate and effective course between the Individual and Society.
In conclusion, we mention a calling by Allah, Almighty (what means): "O You who believe! Shall I lead you to a bargain that will save you from grievous suffering [in this world and in the life to come)? You are to believe in Allah and His Messenger and strive hard in Allah's cause with your possessions and your lives: this is for your own good – if you had known it." [Qur'an, 61: 10-11]  - islamweb.net

17 Benefits of Zakah


Benefits and wisdom of the individual and social Zakah are as follows:
1- Perfecting and completing the Islam of a slave because it is one of the pillars of Islam. So, if one does it, his Islam will be complete and perfect. There is absolutely no doubt that this is a great aim for every Muslim individual. Actually, every Muslim individual seeks to complete his religion.
2- It is proof of the truthfulness of the faith of he who gives Zakah. This is because money is loved by souls and what is loved cannot be sacrificed except in return for something similar to or more beloved than it. Therefore, it is called Sadaqah (i.e. charity) for it indicates the truthfulness of the request of its payer for the Pleasure of Allah The Almighty.
3- It purifies the morals of the payer of Zakah. It disassociates him from the group of misers and includes him in the group of the generous. This is because if one used to give, be it knowledge, money or honor, then giving will become natural for him to the extent that he may feel sad on a day in which he does not give anything.
Such as the hunter who used to hunt. If he delays his hunt on a specific day, he feels sad. The same thing applies to the one who gets himself accustomed to being generous. He feels sad when a day passes by without giving out money, honor or benefit.
4- It expands the breast with assurance and gladdens the heart. This is because if one gives something, especially money, he will feel an assurance in his breast. This is something that is tested and tried, providing that his giving should be done with complete generosity and pleasure. His sacrifice should not dwell in his heart (with regret and displeasure).

Sheykh Ibn Al-Qayyim  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him mentioned in his renowned book 'Zad Al-Ma‘ad' that giving and generosity are included in the causes of expanding the heart with assurance. However, no one can achieve this benefit except one who gives with generosity and pleasure. The money leaves his heart before it leaves his hand. However, the one whose money leaves his hand while his heart is still attached to it will not benefit from giving.
5- It makes one reach the rank of the perfect believer. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.” [Muslim] So, as one loves to be given money to satisfy his needs, he should also love to give it to his brother. By doing so, one will have perfect faith.
6- It is one of the causes of entering Paradise. This is because Paradise is for “those who use soft speech, spread the greeting of Islam, feed people and spend the night in voluntary prayer while the people are asleep.” [Ahmad and At-Tirmithi] All of us earnestly seek to enter Paradise.
7- It makes the Islamic society a single family in which the strong helps the weak and the rich helps the poor. One will feel that he has brothers to whom he has to do good as Allah The Almighty has done good to him. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {And do good as Allah has done good to you.} [Quran 28: 77] Thus, the Islamic nation will be as one family. This is what the later scholars called social solidarity. Zakah is the best thing that can achieve this because one fulfills with it an obligation and benefits his fellows.
8- It extinguishes the fire of the revolution of the poor. This is because the poor are vexed to find someone who rides in whatever he desires (of luxurious modes of transportation), lives in whatever palace he wishes and eats whatever he likes. All this, while (the poor bystander) can only use his (own) legs, does not sleep except on the ground and the like. There is no doubt that he will find something (of an ill feeling) in his heart. However, if the rich give to the poor, this will extinguish their feeling for revolution, calm down their anger and make them say: “We have brothers that take care of us in difficult times” and thus they will love the rich.”
9- It prevents financial crimes such as robbery and stealing. This is because the poor will receive what satisfies their needs and so they will excuse the rich for they give them from their wealth. They give them one quarter of one-tenth (i.e. 2.5 percent) on gold, silver and trade goods, one-tenth or one-half of one-tenth on grains and fruits and a great percentage on flocks. Thus, they will see that they are treating them well and will not transgress against them.
10- Salvation from the intense heat of the Day of Resurrection. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “Every man will be in the shade of his charity on the Day of Resurrection.” [Ahmad]
Furthermore, he  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said regarding the seven categories of people whom Allah The Almighty will shade with the shade He Creates on the day when there will be no shade but His: “A man who gives in charity so secretly that his left hand does not know what his right hand spends;” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
11- It makes one know the limits and rulings of Allah The Almighty because one will not fulfill Zakah unless he knows its rulings, properties, Nisabs (i.e. the minimum amounts liable for Zakah), its recipients and other such matters that the need calls for.
12- It purifies and increases wealth, meaning that, if one gives charity on his wealth, then this will protect it from blight and Allah The Almighty may Increase his provision due to this charity. Therefore, it is mentioned in the Hadeeth: “Wealth does not decrease because of charity.” [Muslim]
It is clearly witnessed that the wealth of a miser may be afflicted with what may destroy it or the most of it due to fire, a great loss or diseases that force him to seek treatment that consume great amounts of his wealth.
13- It is one of the causes of the downfall of goodness. It is mentioned in the Hadeeth: “No people ever withhold the Zakah of their wealth but rain is withheld from the sky.” [Ibn Majah and Al-Hakim]
14- “Charity given in secret extinguishes the wrath of The Lord,” as was authentically narrated from the Messenger  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ). [At-Tirmithi and Ibn Hiban]
15 - “It wards off an unpleasant death.” [At-Tirmithi and Ahmad]
16 - “It wrestles with a calamity that comes down from the heavens and prevents it from reaching earth.” [At-Tabarani]
17 – It expiates sins. The Messenger  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “Charity extinguishes sins as water extinguishes fire.” [Ahmad, At-Tirmithi and An-Nasaa’i] -islamweb.net

Sunday, 10 December 2017

Marriage obligatory on person who fears fornication

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Question

A brother whom I know wants to make Hijrah (emigration) from the lands of disbelief to the lands of Islam, and he is saving up money for it and has a firm plan, but his only problem is regarding women; he cannot control himself if he is around women, and the ruling on him with regards to marriage is that it is obligatory because he fears falling into fornication at a high rate and actually falls into many sins because he is not married. Should he get married first (knowing that it will delay his Hijrah), or should he avoid marriage and just continue saving for it (knowing that he will fall into sins)?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallahu &699;alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
If the situation is as you mentioned, then marriage is an obligation for that man. He must hasten to get married in order to shield himself from Fitnah (temptation) and whatever leads to it. Marriage is given precedence over Hajj to him, so it is given precedence with greater reason over a travel that is at best permissible.
He should try to minimize the cost of marriage so that he could save enough money to travel. Perhaps, if he is mindful of Allah and fears Him as due, Allah will facilitate his affairs and bless him with a way out of his distress. Allah, the Exalted, says (what means): {And whoever fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. And will provide for him from where he does not expect.} [Quran 65:2-3]
He also says (what means): {And whoever fears Allah - He will make for him of his matter ease.} [Quran 65:4]
Allah knows best. -islamweb.net

The Importance of dialogue


According to the Quran, dialogue and reasoning in the best possible way are important methods of communicating, upholding the truth and resisting falsehood. The ultimate aim of doing this is to arrive at the truth. Within the framework of Islamic Da’wah, dialogue is a tool of correction, construction and self-evaluation. Dialogue is a shared tool of awareness due to which opinions are formed, questions are examined and the implications of Islamic or theoretical evidence are concluded. It is a tool of consultation, mutual advice and cooperation in righteousness and piety, which is the road to maturity and perfection. Errors can be corrected, deficiencies are taken care of, and the course of religion and advocacy is straightened out only when we welcome a dialogue and train ourselves to accept criticism and revision. When this happens, our dialogues will be educational and systematic, enriching the Islamic nation with religious studies and academic theses.

The global Islamic awakening has turned into a general renaissance for all classes; it is no longer the sole monopoly of any party. The new generation has a rightful claim on Islamic Da’wah to appreciate their reasoning powers, recognize their abilities and reveal to them the truth concerning the progress of advocacy, whether negative or positive. We are not expected to defend the attitude of one particular Islamic school or famous personality, and then try to justify it or conceal errors; our cause is much deeper and more serious than that. The vanguard of the Islamic awakening aspires to achieve the divine approach to dialogue, with all its clarity and purity of purpose, free from muddiness and blemishes. This is because Allah’s injunctions are clear and His approach will last longer than anyone or anything else.

Difference in opinion is a natural thing and a healthy phenomenon, which enriches the nation with mature ideas. If such difference of opinion is utilized correctly, it becomes a remarkable tool for evaluating things from different points of view and dimensions. Unfortunately, such differences have turned into bitter quarrels and alarming fights that have weakened the body of Islam. This is due to the absence of serious dialogue and mutual consultation by various parties. The channels of a prudent scholarly dialogue are broken, which is why plausible reasoning and similar opinions have turned into a potential source of intellectual partisanship and personal conflict. Dialogues have regressed to being no more than an exchange of accusations and abuse.

Indispensable principles

Over time, scholars have developed certain Sharee'ah-based principles that may be seen as a basic methodology for conducting an Islamically correct and fruitful dialogue. Here are some of these principles:

Knowledge

It is necessary for the interlocutor to be knowledgeable about the subject that he intends to debate over. At the same time, he should be able to examine, weigh and give preference to various types of evidence, deduce results and collect every piece of evidence. Further, he should be familiar with the science of abrogation and abrogated verses of the Noble Quran, the allowed and the restricted, the particular and the general, as well as the authentic and the weak. Nobody should venture into debate without complete intellectual and scholarly faculties. Allah has rebuked those who argue without knowledge, and Says (what means): "Here you are—those who have argued about that of which you have (some) knowledge, but why do you argue about that of which you have no knowledge? And Allah knows, while you know not." [Quran: 3:66].

Partisan education adopted by some Islamic workers destroys the mind and kills creativity, thought and meditation. It relies on drilling its followers in the principles and methodology of the party rigidly and literally, regardless of their validity. Thereafter, the party member is taught to slander and belittle others, while being unaware of the reality, or even the reason why he is being asked to behave in that particular manner, and most seriously, without any knowledge about the punishment of slander. Indoctrination by parties results in an incomplete education; it is only good for creating unthinking people who parrot whatever the party deems correct.

Good understanding

For debate to proceed in the right direction, it is necessary to possess a good understanding of the opponent’s arguments, his evidence and the background influencing his actions. Often, a debate lingers on with differences persisting on both sides and the subjects being discussed becoming increasingly arcane without reaching any conclusion. The reason for this is that each side was unable to understand the basis of the other’s evidence as well as their entire aim.

Understanding is the cornerstone of debate; by contrast, misunderstanding may compel the interlocutor to accept what is wrong, reject what is right or misinterpret things. Imaam Al-Subuki  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him said: "I have often seen people listening, but (they) misunderstand what they hear. Consequently, they would alter the aim intended by the book or the author and mislead their colleagues and their followers into conclusions the author has never meant."

Reasons for misunderstanding
Some of the primary elements which cause misunderstanding are:
- Insufficient knowledge
- Distance between interlocutors, which may force interlocutors to rely solely on hearsay. If both sides were to meet face-to-face and talk to each other, the picture would be clear and all ambiguities will be removed.
- Differences of expression: To avert the problem of linguistic differences, the interlocutor must observe clarity and explicitness. He should be able to control his words and expressions, as well as be accurate in presenting his evidence and supportive arguments.
-islamweb.net

NO GOD, NO VALUE

No-God,-No-Value.jpgWe all strongly feel and believe that human life has ultimate value.  However, can we intellectually justify this non-negotiable feeling and belief we have? Islamic theism has the intellectual tools to justify the truth of our ultimate value.  Conversely, atheism seems to face tremendous philosophical problems.  In short, under atheism, we cannot rationally justify the very thing that defines our humanity.  What follows is a brief philosophical account of why our sense of ultimate value makes sense under God, and why it doesn’t under atheism.  The conclusion is simple: no God, no value; know God, know value.
Like atheism, philosophical naturalism, denies the Divine and the supernatural.  Therefore, it is not surprising that most atheists adopt philosophical naturalism as a worldview.  Philosophical naturalism is the view that all phenomena within the universe can be explained via physical processes.  These physical processes are blind and non-rational.  Philosophical naturalists reject all supernatural claims and some argue that if there is anything ‘outside’ the universe it does not interfere with it.  Atheists, according to Professor Richard Dawkins, are philosophical naturalists.  For Dawkins an atheist "believes there is nothing beyond the natural, physical world".[1]  However, some atheist academics are not naturalists.  Although these atheists deny the Divine, they affirm the existence of non-physical phenomena.  For the theist, this type of atheism is—generally speaking—easier to intellectually engage with because they do not dismiss non-physical phenomena.  In this respect there is some common ground with theism.  It is important to note that most atheists that assert evidence against God’s existence—or argue that there is an absence of strong evidence for the Divine—adopt philosophical naturalism, implicitly or explicitly.
What is the difference between a human and a snow man? This is a serious question.  According to many atheists who adopt a naturalistic worldview, everything that exists is essentially a rearrangement of matter, or at least based on blind, non-conscious physical processes and causes.
If this is true, then does it really matter?
If I were to pick up a hammer and smash a snowman and then I did the same to myself, according to naturalism there would be no real difference.  The lumps of snow and the pieces of my skull would just be rearrangements of the same stuff: cold, lifeless matter.
The typical response to this argument includes the following statements: "we have feelings", "we are alive", "we feel pain", "we have an identity" and "we’re human!" According to naturalism these responses are still just rearrangements of matter, or to be more precise, just neuro-chemical happenings in one’s brain.  In reality everything we feel, say or do can be reduced to the basic constituents of matter, or at least some type of physical process.  Therefore, this sentimentalism is unjustified if one is an atheist, because everything, including feelings, emotions or even the sense of value, is just based on matter and cold physical processes and causes.
Coming back to our original question: what is the difference between a human being and a snowman? The answer according to the atheist perspective is that there is no real difference.  Any difference is just an illusion—there is no ultimate value.  If everything is based on matter and prior physical causes and processes, then nothing has real value.  Unless, of course, one argues that what matters is matter itself.  Even if that were true, how could we appreciate the difference between one arrangement of matter and another? Could one argue that the more complex something is, the more value it has? But why would that be of any value? Remember, nothing has been purposefully designed or created, according to atheism.  It is all based on cold, random and non-conscious physical processes and causes.
The good news is that the atheists who adopt this perspective do not follow through with the rational implications of their beliefs.  If they did, it would be depressing.  The reason that they attribute ultimate value to our existence is because their innate dispositions, which have been created by God, have an affinity to recognise God and the truth of our existence.
From an Islamic point of view God has placed an innate disposition within us to acknowledge our worth, and to recognise fundamental moral and ethical truths.  This disposition is called the fitrah in Islamic thought.  Another reason we can claim ultimate value is because God created us with a profound purpose, and preferred us to most of His creation.  We have value because the One who created us has given us value.
"Now, indeed, We have conferred dignity on the children of Adam… and favoured them far above most of Our creation." (Quran 17:70)
"Our Lord! You have not created all this without purpose." (Quran 3:191)
Islam values the good and those who accept the truth.  It contrasts those who obey God and thereby do good, and those who are defiantly disobedient, and thereby do evil:
"Then is one who was a believer like one who was defiantly disobedient? They are not equal." (Quran 32:18)
Since naturalism rejects the hereafter and any form of Divine justice, it rewards the criminal and the peacemaker with the same end: death.  We all meet the same fate.  So what ultimate value does the life of Hitler or the life of Martin Luther King Jr.  really have? If their ends are the same, then what real value does atheism give us? Not much at all.
However, in Islam, the ultimate end of those who worship God and are compassionate, honest, just, kind and forgiving is contrasted with the end of those who persist with their evil.  The abode of the good is eternal bliss and the abode of the evil is Divine alienation.  This alienation is a consequence of consciously denying God’s mercy and guidance, which inevitably results in spiritual anguish and torment.  Clearly, Islam gives us ultimate value.  However, under atheism, value cannot be rationally justified except as an illusion in our heads.
Despite the force of this argument, some atheists still object.  One of their objections involves the following question: Why does God give us ultimate value? The answer is simple.   God created and transcends the universe, and He has unlimited knowledge and wisdom.  His names include The-Knowing and The-Wise.  Therefore, what He values is universal and objective.  Another way of looking at it is by understanding that God is the maximally perfect Being, which means He is free from any deficiency and flaw.  Therefore, it follows that what He values will be objective and ultimate, because this objectivity is a feature of His perfection.
Another objection argues that even if we were to accept that God gives us ultimate value, it will still be subjective, as it will be subject to His perspective.  This contention is premised on a misunderstanding of what subjectivity means.  It applies to an individual’s limited mind and/or feelings.  However, God’s perspective is based on an unlimited knowledge and wisdom.  He knows everything; we do not.  The classical scholar Ibn Kathir states that God has the totality of wisdom and knowledge; we have its particulars.  In other words: God has the picture, we just have a pixel.
Seyyed Hossein Nasr, Professor of Islamic studies at George Washington University, provides an apt summary of the concept of human rights and dignity—which ultimately refer to value—in the absence of God:
"Before speaking of human responsibilities or rights, one must answer the basic religious and philosophical question, ‘What does it mean to be human?’ In today’s world everyone speaks of human rights and the sacred character of human life, and many secularists even claim that they are true champions of human rights as against those who accept various religious worldviews.  But strangely enough, often those same champions of humanity believe that human beings are nothing more than evolved apes, who in turn evolved from lower life forms and ultimately from various compounds of molecules.  If the human being is nothing but the result of ‘blind forces’ acting upon the original cosmic soup of molecules, then is not the very statement of the sacredness of human life intellectually meaningless and nothing but a hollow sentimental expression? Is not human dignity nothing more than a conveniently contrived notion without basis in reality? And if we are nothing but highly organized inanimate particles, what is the basis for claims to ‘human rights’? These basic questions know no geographic boundaries and are asked by thinking people everywhere."[2]
      Last updated 10 April 2017.  Taken and adapted from my book "The Divine Reality: God, Islam & The Mirage of Atheism".  You can purchase the book here.
-islamreligion.com

FOOTNOTES:
[1]Dawkins, R.  (2006) The God Delusion.  London: Bantam Press, p.  14.
[2]Nasr, S.  H.  (2004).  The Heart of Islam: Enduring Values for Humanity.  New York: HarperSanFrancisco, p.  275.

Saturday, 9 December 2017

It’s all in a hug

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Kids aren't mind readers, but they are capable of reading our body language
When we hear about the tragedies in the world, or about all of the people and children hurt in the worn-torn countries found all around the world; the millions of children who are starving to death or dying of illnesses ...we each should be much, much more thankful to our Creator for all that we have been blessed with and never, ever forget all those who are suffering in our Du’aa (supplications).
Making Du’aa and remembering all those suffering should be a regular occurrence in our households, and with our families. Our children, with all the available perks in life are completely oblivious to the suffering in the world unless we talk to them about it and remind them that for all that they have there are so many that have nothing. By the same token, we need to give ourselves a harsh reminder as well not to take things - specifically our families for granted, as we so often do.
Our children really need us to be there for them, not just to give them lunch – money or pay their allowances.... but to be their rock in the shakable and unsteady world they live in. Most importantly, we need to show them by words and actions, that we love them – at every opportunity we get.
A single action can say, and mean, a lot
We all have clear and concise memories of our parents – clear into our adulthood. We remember what they did, what they said, how they acted, even how they said things... and we also vividly recall what they didn't do or say. Sometimes just a single action in a particular moment can say, and mean a lot to a child, including and especially a teenager. Teenagers and tweens care a lot more about what we, their parent, think, than they would like to let on. So, while they may act like they could care less, there should be no doubt whatsoever that they care immensely.
Some kids, if they do not get adequate positive attention, act out with undesirable behavior to get any attention in any way possible even if it is negative attention from Mom or Dad. Something is always better than nothing, or not enough. Make the time, you may not have it later as we live our lives and get caught up in our own dramas, we often forget that our lives here are only temporary.
At any given time, Allah Almighty forbid it for us, there could be a car accident, a burglary gone bad, an indiscriminate drive-by shooting or let's face it a hate crime committed against any person in our family. People pass away from house-hold accidents every day and then there is illness, which could strike any one of us. These circumstances are all beyond our control and are real.
Because we live with such uncertainty and because we must realize and make our children also understand that they are not invisible... we must make the time to spend with our family and show them we love them; not tomorrow, but today - right now, this moment, because we may not have that time later.
We all have the habit of putting things off, publicly and privately. It is easier, life is busy, and there never is enough time in a day. However, we should take notice to never procrastinate with our love. We cannot afford to take time for granted when it comes to our religion or our family. Time spent on these two vital aspects of our lives is valuable time that is been very well spent.
Start with a hug
I know some of you may not have been raised in a home that displayed affection and the thought of it, the action itself, may be awkward and a little strange. But even if you didn't receive it as a child, know that your children need it from you. Hugging is a whole lot easier than you think, and once you get in the habit of doing it several times per day, it will become natural and a comfort to you and your children.
Comfort in a cuddle!

I make Du’aa that, if haven't already, you begin today by giving your kids a hug each day and tell them you love and care for them. It is such a comfort for a child, or wife or close friend for that matter, to be held close and enclosed in loving arms.
For anyone who may be skeptical about it, you should ask yourself why it seems scary to you. The Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, was known to be very affectionate and caring towards his children and he, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, is our best example and role model as is featured in the following Hadeeth: Abu Salamah, may Allah be pleased with him, related that Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, said: "The Prophet of Allah, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, kissed Hasan ibn ‘Ali while Aqra` ibn Haabis was sitting nearby. Aqra` said, `I have ten children and have never kissed one of them.' The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, looked at him and said, `Those who show no mercy will be shown no mercy"' [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
After you have mulled that over for a while, then ask yourself: what do you really have to lose? -islamweb.net