MyISLAM

Monday, 6 September 2021

Busting Myths About Female Sexuality

When one sees Muslim leaders (even if they’re usually of the male variety) attempt to take on serious and relevant issues to the Muslim Ummah such as sexually dysfunctional marital relationships, one truly hopes for the best.

Alas, well-meaning though they may be, there becomes glaringly obvious a lack of knowledge and understanding regarding female sexuality.

A few claims that are being made and circulated en masse (and dangerously so) are the following:

• Muslim women (especially from ‘conservative, practicing families’) do not really experience sexual arousal or any feelings of intense sexuality before marriage.

• Women’s fitrah is such that they are automatically less sexual than men.

• Muslim women are intimidated and scared by even discussions about sex prior to marriage; if a Muslim man wants to discuss it with his fiancée, he shouldn’t lest she run in the opposite direction.

• Women don’t ‘need’ to orgasm as much as men do; their sexual feelings are minimal and what they truly seek from sexual encounters is not necessary physical pleasure, but emotional connection.

Not only are all these claims inaccurate, but to perpetuate them on a massive public forum – and by an individual with significant influence over large numbers of Muslims – is extremely dangerous due to the fact that the Muslim community already suffers from a horrific lack of knowledge and awareness about sex and female sexuality.

This Is Not Islam

Such ridiculous ideas include the belief that women have a lesser need and appreciation for the physical aspect of intimacy; that they do not experience intense sexual arousal prior to marriage; and that the very idea of sex is disturbing and unnatural to them, or that they are unable to comprehend the true nature of intercourse before marriage.

Despite the fact that Islamic texts fully recognize women’s sexual needs and in fact protects them as a religious right, many male Muslim leaders perpetuate cultural stereotypes about the nature of female sexuality and falsely pass them off as Islamic guidance.

In all fairness, even Western cultures and scientific thought has long held faulty and inaccurate beliefs regarding female sexuality (most famously, the views of Sigmund Freud and the Victorian phenomenon of ‘hysteria’).

However, it is also true that Western society has moved along with considerable speed with regards to knowledge of female sexuality than many Eastern (and Muslim) cultures have.

It must still be kept in mind, though, that the amount of studies and research collected on female sexuality is dwarfed by those about men, and that there remains a great deal to be discovered about female sexuality in general.

Going back to the claims being publicly taught, there is first of all a severely erroneous conflation between the reality of culturally ingrained attitudes about sex, and the actual innate physical desires and needs that women have for sex.

While it is absolutely true that many Muslim cultures teach women unhealthy negative attitudes about sex and equate female sexual desire with being dirty or impure, this in no way actually reflects the physiological need for sex that exists in the female gender as a whole.

No matter how much cultural brainwashing women receive regarding their sexuality, most women will still inevitably experience feelings of sexual arousal at some point in their lives – and for those who do, it will generally first happen before marriage.

Furthermore, the arousal a woman feels can and does reach strong levels of intensity, including orgasm; for example, in a wet dream. This was acknowledged even by prophet Muhammad (PBUH), who confirmed Umm Sulaym’s question regarding female wet dreams.[1]

Women are no less sexual than men

Even outside of wet dreams and masturbation however, women can and do feel intense sexual stimulation – anything from wearing a new pair of jeans or sitting on a massage chair. This is not to be crude, but simply realistic

Nor are such experiences purely involuntary; many women are curious about their bodies and are actively aware of what stimulates them both physically and mentally (after all, the brain is the most powerful sex organ).

Sexual curiosity exists in women just as it exists in men; since many girls mature physically and mentally faster than boys, they can be ahead of the game when it comes to being curious about sex.

Whether it’s reading romance novels (and anyone who thinks that girls read romance novels just for the emotional fluff is fooling themselves) or magazines like Cosmopolitan, girls crave information about both the romantic and the explicitly sexual.

Talk about sex

Communication about sexual issues is another matter, one tied much more strongly to the aforementioned cultural brainwashing about intimacy than the idea that women have an inherent and instinctive fear or aversion to sex.

Advising Muslim men to ‘just pray Istikharah’ instead of respectfully discussing or asking questions related to sex with their fiancées is harmful and, quite frankly, insulting to both the man and the woman.

We should not be perpetuating attitudes of embarrassment, shame, and stigma about sexual issues but rather, encouraging men and women to approach the topic with respect, dignity, and honesty. It may be uncomfortable at first or awkward, but then, all positive growth and change is by necessity.

It is necessary to say here that a great deal of work needs to be done in training Muslim men and women on how to discuss matters related to sex and marriage in a respectful, dignified, and mature manner.

There is one final issue – the idea that women are innately ‘less sexual’ than men. While there is no denying the biological differences between men and women, including sexually, there is a big difference between recognizing the difference, and claiming that women simply aren’t as sexual.

More accurate would be to state that what men and women find sexually appealing and arousing, how they react to such stimuli, and the levels at which they respond to such urges differ greatly – but do not take away from the inherent sexuality of women.

Women do get orgasm

It is also a fallacy to say that the sole or primary benefit or reason that women engage in sex is for an emotional connection; rather, while some women do enjoy sex more because of the emotional connection, it is not a necessary component of their actual satisfaction or orgasm.

In fact, the vagina – specifically the clitoris – has thousands more nerve endings than the penis, which means that its orgasm can be correspondingly much, much more intense than the male orgasm, and contradicts the belief of those men who are convinced that women don’t really ‘feel it.’ (Not to mention that women are capable of different types of orgasm and multiple orgasms.)

Should this become a recurring pattern, where husbands reach climax but make no effort to ensure their wives’ satisfaction, women often end up angry and resistant to being sexually available.

It is worth noting that, once sexually aroused, women have a much stronger need to orgasm than men do. If they are stimulated and left unsatisfied, it causes extreme emotional upset (and significant physical discomfort).

Psychological Haleh Banani mentions as well that women who are emotionally unsatisfied in their marriages yet are sexually fulfilled have higher rates of remaining within that marriage than the other way around. If that doesn’t underscore the point well enough, I don’t know what will.

The claim that women have fewer or less intense desires, or a somehow less important need for orgasm, is in fact an unhealthy way of minimizing female sexuality and its priority in a relationship.

This takes place both amongst Muslims and non-Muslims and is a sign of how misogyny permeates our attitudes such that we automatically do not consider women to be of equal footing even in bed (and God help any woman who shows any sign of initiating sexual interest or contact!).

While the argument may go on to rage over who is ‘more’ sexual (keeping in mind that new studies continue to emerge on the topic, with sometimes paradoxical results), there is no benefit to be gained from pushing the view that women are simply less sexual beings.

In fact, it does the opposite, by telling men that they do not have to consider their wives’ sexual needs to be as important or necessary (the caveat that ‘a woman’s right to sexual satisfaction is guaranteed in Islam’ does nothing to change the final message).

It is also implying to women that they should give up hope of true sexual satisfaction because it’s unrealistic and biologically unnecessary for them to experience it (but hey, all women really want are snuggles and warm fuzzy cuddles, right?).

It is high time that we begin to provide qualified individuals in the Muslim community who can discuss sex – and especially female sexuality – from a more nuanced and accurate perspective.

Otherwise, Muslim leaders who take it upon themselves to talk about the subject are simply contributing to the already terrible state of Muslim intimacy, and the continued struggles of Muslim women seeking satisfaction and fulfillment in their own marriages.

What truly needs to be encouraged, emphasized, and taught is the importance of men and women alike to improve communication with their spouses about matters of intimacy. From there, it should become much easier for husbands and wives to become comfortable with their own and each others’ bodies; and for husbands to understand the various factors affecting women that may be significantly responsible for obstacles to sexual fulfillment.

Just as men have their own unique preferences, levels of libido, and so on, so too are the tastes and desires of women varied and vast.

To truly seek an improvement to the sex lives of married Muslims, the first step should not be to make sweeping generalizations of female sexuality that are based on androgenic perspectives.

Rather, it must be recognized that championing outdated ideas causes a great deal of harm to both men and women. A more nuanced and accurate understanding of female sexuality must be collectively pursued in order to see significant positive change in Muslim marriages.

This article is from our archive, originally published on an earlier date, and now republished for its importance.

[1] Umm Salama (Allah be pleased with her) relates that Umm Sulaym (Allah be pleased with her) came to the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) and said, “O Messenger of Allah, Surely, Allah is not shy of the truth. Is it necessary for a woman to take a ritual bath after she has a wet dream?” The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) replied: “Yes, if she notices a discharge.” Umm Salama covered her face and asked, “O Messenger of Allah! Does a woman have a discharge?” He replied: “Yes, let your right hand be in dust [an Arabic expression said light-heartedly to someone whose statement you contradict], how does the son resemble his mother?” (Sahih al-Bukhari 130)

Sunday, 5 September 2021

Entering Paradise in Chains!

In his well-known book, Al-Hikam (Words of Wisdom), sheikh Ahmad Ibn `Ataa’illah As-Sakandari says:

“He knew that people will mostly not come voluntarily to Him, so He mandated obedience, and thus led them to Him in the chains of obligation. The Lord wonders about people, driven into heaven through chains.”

This means that Allah the Almighty, Glory be His, knew that people would mostly not come voluntarily to Him to perform obedience of their own will. So He mandated obedience compulsorily, by threatening them with punishment if they do not.

Hence, He led them to Him in the chains of obligation and intimidation, gradually leading them to what guides them to eternal pleasure and elevates them to high levels.

He also knew that if He were to leave them to be controlled by their reason and the incentives of their natural disposition (i.e. fitrah) which are inherent in their human entities, they would be overcome by their whims and lustful desires.

In other words, according to Ibn `Ataa’illah, Allah the Almighty knew that most people could not see what is good for them and what may make them happy because of their psychological desires and instinctive needs.

In the same vein, they would turn away from contemplating over what is dictated by sound reason and what is ordained by beneficial knowledge.

Therefore, out of the Mercy and Kindness of the Almighty Lord, He helps them to the path of guidance and happiness through orders and ordainments and leads them towards what is beneficial for them through commitment and obligation.

This is similar to the father who disciplines a child and obliges him to unpleasant difficult tasks that are to his disliking, and only when he grows up does he discover their value. He discovers that only when his own immature mental faculties failed to realize what was good for his own self his father turned his words of guidance and pieces of advice into orders and obligations.

This is also similar to the hadith narrated by Abu Hurairah in which the Prophet (Peace and blessings be upon him) said,

“Allah wonders about people who will enter Paradise in chains.” (Al-Bukhari)

This hadith refers to the prisoners of Badr from among the polytheists who were captured and then, when they had the chance to know Islam and interact with Muslims, reverted to Islam.

As they did not know anything about the goodness and blessing that were awaiting them through staying for a while amidst the Muslims and under the protection of Prophet Muhammad (Peace and blessings be upon him); a matter which eventually led them to embrace Islam and become faithful believers in Allah the Almighty and His blessed Messenger.

Remarkably, one should realize that the said chains of obligation are not restricted only to the compulsory rulings that are mandated by Allah the Almighty upon His servants. Rather, these chains of obligation may be represented in trials and calamities that may drive those who are afflicted with them to an end of happiness and welfare which they would have never reached or gained access to except through the scourges of such calamities.

Indeed, the Battle of Badr to which Muslims were brought step by step is a typical example of these chains of obligation which are mentioned in the above hadith of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).

Eventually, the end result of these chains was nothing but a unique victory which led to many other great victories in the battles that followed. In these battles, Muslims gained spoils many times as much as the spoils they had desired to seize from the caravan which they set out in the first place to intercept and which managed to evade capture as is indicated in the books on earlier Muslim history. In this connection, Allah the Almighty says in the Ever-Glorious Qur’an what may mean,

{Yet, behold! God had promised you [believers], then that one of the two hosts that you had come upon would fall to you. And you wished that the unarmed one, the trade caravan, would be yours. Yet God intended to establish the religion of truth [in the land] – in accordance with His words – and to cut off the very last remnant of the disbelievers.} (Al-Anfal 8:7)

Accordingly, as true Muslims, we have to obey Allah the Almighty and carry out all His obligations and ordinances out of certainty that only through this we will pursue our interests and find our happiness. We have to realize that all we are ordered to do and/or forbidden from is meant only to guarantee our happiness and welfare in this present life as well as the Hereafter.

Then, Ibn `Ataa’illah gave emphasis to this through the following word of wisdom which reads,

He has obligated you to serve Him but in doing so He has only obligated you to enter His Paradise.

This means that Almighty Allah apparently obliged you to serve Him, and in reality is only obliging you to enter His heaven, for He made deeds cause for entry to heaven. What is meant here and in the aforementioned word of wisdom is stating that Allah is Rich beyond His creation: their obedience does not benefit Him, and their disobedience does not harm Him. All orders and mandates in reality bring benefit to them, and He is the Most Wealthy, the Most Gracious.

Allah Almighty says in His Ever-Glorious Qur’an what may mean,

{…For it is God alone Who is the Self-Sufficient. And it is you who are the poor.} (Muhammad 47:38)

and,

{O mankind! It is you who are the poor, utterly in need of God. And it is God alone Who is the Self-Sufficient, the All-Praised.} (Fatir 35:15)

Finally and to sum up, the above two words of wisdom by Ibn `Ataa’illah As-Sakandari mean that Allah the Almighty knew that most of His slaves are not self-motivated in seeking Him; so, He obligated for them obedience to Him. He pushed them towards Him with the chains of obligation. And that He, Glory be His, has obligated them to serve Him but in doing so He has only obligated them to go to His everlasting Heaven.

Saturday, 4 September 2021

Qiblah Finding: Art Made Easier Through Ages

For millions of Muslims around the world, traveling is part of their routine. Whether for studies, business or pleasure, the need to embark on long-distance journeys arises continuously and with this comes the challenge of determining the correct direction of the Qiblah while on such trips.

The importance of identifying the Qiblah (direction towards the Kaabah in Makkah) lies in the obligation of performing the five daily Prayers in the life of a Muslim.

Making a sincere attempt to face the Qiblah is one of the conditions for the validity of Prayer.

When a mosque is accessible in their respective home countries many Muslims hardly bother about this since the Qiblah is already identified inside their mosques.

However, when one is travelling and cannot find a mosque (or is unfortunate enough to land in a mosque where the Qiblah is not correctly positioned,) knowing how to find the Qiblah becomes a handy skill.

An Age Old Problem

The puzzle was to devise a means of finding the direction of the Kaabah in Makkah at all times. By employing advanced trigonometry, they eventually came up with medieval Qiblah tables, which had a high degree of accuracy.

Precise observation, as well as an uncanny ability to derive new solutions to ancient problems, was perhaps what made Muslim scientists outstanding in the Middle Ages. It therefore did not come as a surprise when they embarked on the arduous journey of mathematically determining the Qiblah.

However, the sophistication of these tables, which even European geographers at that time couldn’t fully comprehend, limited their use (Lunde).

Another popular instrument that was used for determining the Qiblah then became the Astrolabe.

Initially designed mainly for astrology, navigation, and surveying, astronomers from the Islamic world soon found another use for it.
By adding special tables to the existing ones at the back of the conventional astrolabe, it had the added functionality of finding the direction to Makkah, and consequently the Qiblah. (Winterburn)

Life Made Easier

It was necessary to cater to the needs of the growing Muslim population that had spread far beyond the Arabian Peninsula thereby making the determination of the Qiblah with the available instruments a more challenging task.

With the rapid spread of Islam came the demand for more accurate, easier-to-use instruments with which the direction of the Qiblah could be determined almost effortlessly.

By incorporating it into the astrolabe, it was possible to find Makkah from anywhere around the Islamic world.

In the 13^th century AD, the introduction of the compass to the Islamic world revolutionized the entire Qiblah finding process (Winterburn).

Further advancements saw the compass being used alongside other Qiblah indicators such as the Sundial and the Persian Qiblah indicator, all of which were quite famous during the 18^th century.

Compass Tools

With the proliferation of smartphones and other digital gadgets, the usual problems faced while trying to find the Qiblah are fast fading away.

In the late 20^th century compass-based tools were made to help Muslims quickly find the Qiblah. A compass specially marked and coded for major cities around the world and with the Kaabah drawn inside its dial became popular at one point. A similar compass stuck to a portable prayer mat also became commonly sold around the world. But in this present century, things couldn’t have gotten better for the Muslim Ummah.

Be it a wristwatch, mobile phone or hand-held GPS device, the most important thing is to ensure they are equipped with either a compass or a relevant map to be able to perform the needed function of finding the Qiblah in real-time.

The latest trend has become the use of Location Based Services (LBS). LBS involve software solutions configured to work with a handheld mobile device, which in turn operates on a specific wireless network.

When used in conjunction with a Geographical Information System (GIS) server application, it readily provides the device owner with vital information such as the routes to, and location of, Makkah relative to their own present location or position. (GIM International)

The combination of GIS and GPS technologies has analytical capabilities that make it possible to determine the individual location of each mobile phone user. Thereafter, required information such as the location of the Qiblah and other places of interest is presented to the user via a map interface. For devices that do not support a graphical map interface, the requested information comes in the form of textual or audio instructions.

Sadly though, the high cost of these gadgets limits the number of prospective buyers and users.

A Controversial Issue?

Quite similar to the contentious issue of moon sighting especially prior to the commencement of the holy month of Ramadan, “Qiblah finding” is one topic that sometimes causes tempers to flare when being discussed.

While some people believe the center of the face has to be perfectly aligned with the center of the Kaabah for the prayer to be valid, others believe this position is too rigid and need not be adopted.

The prophet Muhammad (PBUH) is reported to have said:“Whatever is between the east and the west is the Qibla.” (Narrated by al-Tirmdihi, 342; Ibn Maajah, 1011)

Though short, the profound meaning derivable from this hadith forms the basis of many Islamic verdicts (Fatwas) on Qiblah.

Scholars’ Opinions

As a result, the majority of scholars, including two of the four great Imams, Ahmad ibn Hanbal and Abu Hanifah, are of the opinion that the one who is close to the Kaabah is required to face it head on, while the one who is far away from it must seek the general direction of the Kaabah, without having to face it precisely. (Al-Munajid)

Hence, a slight deviation in the Qiblah is generally regarded as something permissible as long as the worshipper has done his utmost in trying to get it right, and perfection sure lies with Allah alone. There might not be much cause for worry if the deviation from the Qiblah is slight, but what happens if the deviation was great or totally off while praying?

According to a verdict issued by the highest religious decision making body in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, “If a worshipper does his best to identify the direction of the Qiblah and prays, then he discovers that he was mistaken, his prayer is still valid.” (Fataawa Al-Lajnah Al-Daa’imah-6/314)

Whether a slight or great deviation, the key issue seems to be the actual effort and level of sincerity displayed in trying to figure out the right direction of the Qiblah.

Therefore, the quarrels that sometimes arise when trying to establish the right position of the Qiblah at a certain location might just be uncalled for.

As Muslims, we are of the firm conviction that whatever Allah commands us to do is ultimately for our benefit, and this includes facing the Kaabah in Prayer.

The same way we strive day and night, spending lots of money to acquire quality education, posh cars, and houses, we need to channel similar amount of resources, energy, zeal, and passion towards our religion.

By so doing, we are likely to always get the direction of the Qiblah right irrespective of which part of the globe we find ourselves; and if not, our Lord is most merciful, oft-forgiving.

References:

Lunde, Paul and Bilkadi, Zayn. “Arabs and Astronomy.” Saudi Aramco World Magazine. January/February 1986.

Winterburn, Emily. “Using an Astrolabe.” Foundation for Science Technology and Civilization (FSTC) Limited. August 2005.

Winterburn, Emily. “Astronomical Instruments through Time.” BBC. 30 May 2009. Accessed 27 July 2009.

“Location-Based Services for Emergencies.” GIM International. Reed Business, Netherlands. May 2009.

Al-Munajid, Salih. “Conditions for Prayers-Question No. 91405.” Islam Q & A. 30 May 2009. Accessed 27 July 2009.

“A Mistake in the Direction of the Qiblah-Fataawa Al-Lajnah Al-Daa’imah-6/314.” Islam Q & A. 27 July 2009.

This article is from our archive, originally published on an earlier date, and now republished for its importance.

Friday, 3 September 2021

Overwhelmed with Sorrow?

Why do you look so sad? What is the point of sorrow in your life? Are you living your life or just surviving?

People may laugh and play, but does that mean they don’t harbor sorrow and regret? If all the world continually grumbled about their problems, the world would be overcome with sorrow and discomfort. In such a climate could mankind survive? Could mankind develop?

But what if man were to look at himself inwardly, just like looking into a mirror—reflecting his sorrow with that of man’s history from the beginning of time. Consider the short years you spend in this life and look again at how short is the time of sorrow compared with that of happiness and contentment.
What you need to do is get rid of the sorrow in your heart; cast it away and start finding ways to make you happy. Strength comes with the ability to feel content in the midst of trouble, frustration, and turmoil. But where does that innate happiness come from?

Allah created you, and He also created sorrow as a reflection of happiness. Through sorrow we appreciate joy, just like we comprehend coolness through knowing warmth.

Sometimes man thinks he can do everything, that he can be perfect. Man fluctuates between underestimating himself and overestimating himself, rarely appreciating his true condition. Wisdom is built from experience, but how many times do we run away from mistakes that are the seeds of wisdom?

If you spend your life blaming yourself for everything that happens, you are guilty of denying the role of destiny in your life; you are also guilty of blaming your Lord for creating certain circumstances!

Learn to roll with life’s punches and learn from your Lord about yourself, about life, and about what He wants from you, His creature. If you run away from your mistakes, this will simply lead you to make more. Let your heart be attached to the Almighty, Who is the Infallible, the All-Knowing. Then you will know yourself and begin to grow.

Do we, tiny creatures that we are, possibly comprehend the wisdom of the Creator? Mankind sees through a narrow vision of life: we cannot perceive what others perceive; we cannot see life in its overall beauty. So why do we complain, blame, and feel hopeless?

Overwhelming sorrow is destructive, and uncontrollable sadness is disastrous. These things are tools in the hands of Satan to control mankind and lead him, unawares, to his destruction. Happiness, on the other hand, is distributed by the angels, so take your share and give it to others—then indeed, it will again be returned to you.

Excessive weeping over a problem or sorrow is a sign of dissatisfaction with your Lord. It is natural for mankind to experience a variety of emotions and, indeed, this is what makes him unique; but wallowing in these emotions will certainly destroy us. Allah the Almighty has called on us to rein in these emotions and make them follow a positive and beautiful channel.

And at times of grief, it is the ultimate test to wade through negativity and hopelessness and squeeze the following words out of your mouth: “From Allah we come and to Him we shall return.” At that moment of submission your soul will be set free from the sadness that threatens to swallow you up.

Truly in the remembrance of the Lord do the hearts find rest. - aboutislam.net

Thursday, 2 September 2021

Moral Excellence in Islam

• Author: Shaykh Muhammad Al-Khidhr Husayn

Islam was revealed to people so that they would build with it a moral civilization in this worldly life and savor genuine bliss in the Hereafter. One of the requirements of achieving this lofty goal entailed that the Islamic teachings should incorporate systems regulating the relationships between the created beings and their Creator; i.e., the provisions of ‘Ibaadaat (Sharee‘ah rulings pertaining to the acts of worship), and those regulating the relationships among people; i.e., the provisions of Mu‘aamalaat (Sharee‘ah rulings regulating the interactions and transactions among people), including the judicial and political matters.

The proper and regular performance of acts of worship and the conducting of interactions and transactions among people entail that they should be informed by a well-established moral and ethical system.

Therefore, the wisdom of Islam necessitated that it should foster moral cultivation rather than settling for the establishment of Sharee‘ah rulings organizing people’s actions that are the central focus of religious obligations.

This is why the ethics and morality were extensively discussed in the various Sharee‘ah sciences.

If we contemplate the ethical and moral values that are conducive to carrying out the practical religious duties, we will realize that they revolve around forbearance, munificence, courage, Hayaa’ (bashfulness and modesty), truthfulness, patience, dignity, humbleness, firm resolve, fulfillment of covenant, asceticism, justice, and honesty.

This article does not aim to delineate these moral qualities like psychologists do, investigating their essence, dividing them into primary and subsidiary categories, highlighting the similarities and differences between the subsidiary categories, identifying their implications and effects, and culminating their discussions with proposing ways to cultivate them within young children. Such detailed account requires allocating a lecture for each moral quality at the very least.

What I can do in this article, though, is to provide a glimpse of these moral values, briefly touch upon the correlation between the Islamic guidance and them, and how the Islamic teachings emphasize their lofty status and urge people to adorn themselves with them, so that our youth would be better aware that the true religion of Islam aims to foster morality, being the very basis on which the happiness of nations is founded. This is why Islam emphasizes moral cultivation and urges Muslims to embody the (lofty) ethical and moral values in a more logical and applicable manner, compared to the philosophers’ approach.

Moral Excellence: Forbearance

As for forbearance, which refers to self-control and restraining anger so as not to be easily and quickly provoked, the Quran mentioned it among the characteristics of the true believers. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {and those who restrain anger} [Quran 3:134] When experiencing inner peace generated by the restraint of anger, a person is inclined to give up retaliation for the offence he took, and this is the pardon to which the Quran referred in His Saying (which means): {and who pardon the people} [Quran 3:134].

So, the inner peace experienced by the offended person in this context, empowering him to keep his anger in check, is a manifestation of perfect moral refinement, and when it is joined with graciously resisting the urge to retaliate, moral refinement is further perfected.

The correlation between pardon and the Islamic teachings is that one of the objectives of the Islamic Da‘wah is to build a united Ummah (nation), whose members cooperate in righteousness and piety, and this objective can only be achieved by eliminating the causes of dissension and discord. In addition, since the members of a large social group are bound to offend one another by some word or deed, one of the moral values promoted and fostered by Islam is turning a blind eye to such lapses and pardoning them.

Forbearance, in the sense of keeping one’s anger in check, has a significant impact on the success of politics. In fact, forbearance, in the sense of turning a blind eye to some lapses, is also considered one of the requirements of good governance. Under the care of forbearing and magnanimous statesmen, the reformers can find the field of Da‘wah wide open before them to work in an atmosphere of reassurance and confidence in realizing the most sublime objectives and the most favorable results.

Moral Excellence: Munificence

As for munificence, one of the higher objectives of the Sharee‘ah is to fulfill the needs of the poor and help them meet their living costs. This is why Zakaah is prescribed, charity is recommended, and the Sharee‘ah prescribes financial duties on men, like the obligation of providing for wives, children, and some relatives. There is no doubt that Islam aims to purify the human self from the vice of miserliness and replace it with the virtue of munificence, so that whenever Muslims are commanded to spend in charity, they would hasten to comply with good grace, embodying unsparing generosity.

It would not be wrong to say that one of the reasons for the unfavorable conditions of many Muslim peoples is withholding charity for the Sake of Allah.

The Islamic Shree‘ah does not settle for urging Muslims to spend in charity from the surplus of their wealth but rather lauds altruism and putting others’ needs before one’s own needs, describing it as the peak of munificence. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {… but they give [them] preference over themselves, even though they are in privation.} [Quran 59:9]

Moral Excellence: Bravery

There are two kinds of bravery: military bravery, which refers to self-sacrifice for the sake of religion, honor, or wealth; and moral bravery, which refers to a man’s striving to speak out and proclaim the truth before people in power by enjoining good or forbidding evil while being indifferent to the harm that may be afflicted on him, and both kinds of bravery were given considerable attention by Islam.

As for military bravery, Islam commands the Muslim soldiers to adhere to steadfastness on the battlefield when the enemy’s troops are twice their number, and renders fleeing from the battlefield a grave sin incurring the wrath of Allah, The Almighty, punishable by Hellfire on the Day of Resurrection.

As for moral bravery, Islam considers enjoining good and forbidding evil one of the obligations of faith, and it is not the exclusive duty of the appointed ‘official’ scholars, nor some scholars in a special uniform, but rather an individual duty required of each and every Muslim who witnesses the neglect of good, while knowing it to be good, or the commission of evil, while knowing it to be evil. The researching jurists have discussed this religious obligation in length, and it is sufficient to point out here that Imaam ‘Arafah issued a Fatwa indicating that the fear of being deposed from office is not a valid excuse to give up the obligation of forbidding evils.

Every Muslim is required to embody the two virtues: military and moral bravery to the best of his ability. Whoever knows that the Muslim Ummah does not fall under a ruthless foreign domination except when it loses military bravery, and that dissoluteness and oppression do not prevail among Muslims except when moral bravery is lost, realizes the secret behind the special attention given by the wise Sharee‘ah to these two virtues.

Moral Excellence: Hayaa’ (bashfulness and modesty)

Hayaa’ refers to the emotional response that deters a person from doing what is unbecoming of him (and what may constitute a breach of decorum). Islam gives considerable care and attention to this moral value, so much so that the Prophet made it the slogan of Islam. In a Saheeh (authentic) Hadeeth, he said: “Every religion has a distinct characteristic and the characteristic of Islam is Hayaa’.”

He also underlined that a person who is deprived of this moral quality is not hoped to be rightly guided nor relish virtuousness. He said: “If you fail to embody Hayaa’, do whatever you want!”

Perhaps you have sensed, like I have, that the word ‘freedom’ is being circulated by people who do not realize its true essence nor value it as due, and this has undermined the virtue of Hayaa’ in the hearts of some Muslims. Alas, we find some Muslim youth who may boldly say or do what is unbecoming of them in the presence of their parents, older relatives, or others, claiming that it is one of the requirements of freedom in this age!

In fact, Hayaa’ is a moral adornment that adds to the dignity of an old man and the courteousness of a young one. I believe that a parent should allow his child to express himself in his presence and discuss worldly or scientific issues to train him, under his supervision, on expressing and discussing sound opinions, and whenever he deviates from the virtue of Hayaa’ in words or gestures, the parent should alert him gently and advise him wisely.

Moral Excellence: Truthfulness

Truthfulness has a great impact on the nobility of the individual and the regulation of civil affairs. When a person is known for lying, he is despised by others and disdained in their gatherings, disqualifying him from any chance of supremacy.

Moreover, habitual lying spoils one’s interactions and dealings with people and renders his narration and testimony rejected. It is not strange that religion, which aims to rectify the affairs of both individuals and groups, fosters the virtue of truthfulness and deems lying uncompromisingly forbidden, so much so that the Prophet considered it among the meanest of all vices and warned that genuine faith cannot take root in a heart along with lying. It was narrated by Imaam Maalik in Al-Muwatta’ that the Messenger of Allah was asked: “Can a believer be a liar?” He said: “No!”

Moral Excellence: Patience

Patience refers to inner peace and tranquility when an unpleasant event occurs, such as the loss of wealth or the death of a loved one. This implies steadfastness in the pursuit of a praiseworthy attainment and enduring potential hardship in this regard. It also refers to patience in performing acts of obedience, which implies restraining oneself from following desires and committing prohibitions. It refers as well to patience in refraining from committing sins.

Each of these three meanings is founded on harnessing abundant virtue and sound mind, for a person adheres to patience when unexpected calamities befall him, when striving to obtain a laudable attainment, or when he is overwhelmed by sinful desires, only if he is equipped with in-depth knowledge and awareness of the causes and consequences of things. This is why patience, with its three meanings, is one of the foremost moral values to which Islam assigns great care. One of its merits is that it helps a person adhere to frugality, shielding him against incurring debts and sparing him its humiliation.

Moral Excellence: Dignity

Dignity means that a person should know his own value and reject humiliation and insult. One of the higher objectives of the Sharee‘ah is for the Muslim Ummah to lead a decent life, and this essentially eliminates the possibility of tolerating humiliation. Another higher objective of the Sharee‘ah is for the Ummah to build a powerful revered nation.

Dignity prevents the Muslim Ummah from accepting injustice and urges the Muslim individual to avoid whatever may lead to his humiliation. It may prompt an employee to perform his tasks as due to avoid the reproach of his superior, and prompts a person who is able to work to earn a living and spare himself the humiliation of begging people for money.

Moral Excellence: Firm Resolve

Having a firm resolve empowers a person to seek after far-reaching objectives and accordingly aspire to the most honorable deeds and the most prestigious ranks. He would not settle for the less honorable deeds or lower ranks as long as he is capable of doing and attaining better ones.

An Arab poet said (what means): “A great strong-willed person perceives the hardest challenges effortless, and a weak-willed person perceives the least challenges insurmountable.”

Islam urges Muslims to embody this noble moral value, for the great conquests, huge projects, brilliance, and significant advances in various fields of knowledge are nothing but the fruits of firm resolve. Informed by his firm resolve, Ibn Hazm gave up his office in the cabinet to devote himself entirely to acquiring more knowledge.

Moral Excellence: Fulfillment of Covenants

The fulfillment of covenants is one of the noblest moral values emphasized by Islam. It strongly warns against the breach of covenants, deems obligatory on the individuals to honor them to discipline their conduct and rectify their interactions, and requires statesmen to honor their covenants so that countries trust their treaties and they rule in an upright manner. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {And fulfill the covenant of Allah when you have taken it, [O believers] …} [Quran 16:91] He also Says (what means): {… so complete for them their treaty until their term [has ended]. Indeed, Allah loves the righteous [who fear Him].} [Quran 9:4]

Islam also forbids Muslims from acting in a way contrary to what they say and considers it one of the deeds that incur the wrath of Allah, The Exalted. He Says (what means): {O you who have believed, why do you say what you do not do? Most hateful it is with Allah that you say that which you do not do.} [Quran 61:2-3]

Fulfilling covenants includes the fulfillment of promises, provided that it is within a person’s ability to fulfil them. This noble verse indicates the obligation of fulfilling the promise, as it renders the promised good among the rights of the promised person, and breaking such promise is like an act of transgression against him.

Another relevant moral value is graciousness towards old friends, and it refers to upholding and honoring the rights of friendship and companionship, if there should be discord between a person and his friend or he happened to relish ease after hardship. When an honorable person relishes ease after hardship, he does not forget those who stood by his side at the time of hardship. It was narrated in a Saheeh (authentic) Hadeeth that a woman visited the Prophet and he met her with a warm welcome and compassionately asked after her. When she left, he said: “She used to visit us in the days of Khadeejah, and graciousness towards old friends is part of faith.”

Moral Excellence: Asceticism

The Islamic Sharee‘ah promotes asceticism (Zuhd) and lauds those who embody it. Asceticism refers to the renunciation of wealth, comfort and (worldly) adornment, and detaching one’s heart from their charm that lure a person into seeking after them even by unlawful means.

In this sense, asceticism helps a person have dignity, munificence, and chastity. However, some people have misunderstood asceticism, which is a refined moral value, and associated it with a person who refrains from working and earning a living despite his ability and is content with being among the poor who rely on the charitable giving of the rich.

As for justice, it is a moral value that urges a person to give everyone his due, and its merits best manifest in judging among the disputing people. To embody justice, a person needs to cultivate several moral virtues such as moral bravery, dignity, and having little interest in the pursuit of material gains.

Many Quranic verses and Hadeeth texts underlined the command to uphold justice, and the Prophet highlighted the categories of people whom Allah, The Exalted, shall shade in the shade of His Throne on the Day of Resurrection, and mentioned at the top of the list a just ruler.

As to honesty, it refers to a moral value by means of which a person keenly honors the wealth or work entrusted to him. The Sharee‘ah laid significant emphasis on honesty; it forbids a Muslim from disposing of what is entrusted to his care, such as a trust or a loaned or leased property, except within the scope of the authorization of the owner (principal). It also commands a person to fulfill his job as due. This category also incorporates the enjoined professional proficiency, good governance, and sincerity in teaching. Whoever cheats his clients or fails to display honesty in the governance of his country has betrayed his nation, and whoever fails to apply the best and most effective educational curricula has betrayed his students.

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As-Sumuw Al-Khuluqi Fee Al-Islaam, summarized and modified.

-islamweb.net

Wednesday, 1 September 2021

5 Ways to Propel Peace

If they seek peace, then seek you peace. And trust in Allah for He is the One that heareth and knoweth all things.
~ Qur’an 8:61

Peace is a big part of Islam as it promotes the understanding of peace through submission to Allah (SWT). This applies to the ordinary sense of developing your spiritual growth through balance and harmony.

So, propel peace in your neighborhood, family and amongst fellow countryman by taking these simple steps to be contagiously peaceful to family friends and even strangers:

Offer Salutation

Better yet, it can invoke the response that is hoped for, and that is someone responding to your salutation by giving salaam or saying hello in return.

Just say Assalaamu ‘Alaikum (Peace be with you) – It’s amazing to see the reaction to a simple gesture such as giving salaam or saying hello can do.

Make it a habit to greet everyone at your neighborhood, workplace and even while shopping. This would have a magical impact on both you and people around you.

Have Ihsan

Ihsan simply means having good intentions towards anything that is living. There are many ways this can be achieved, such as being fair and just in all your doings, being selfless, giving without expecting anything in return.

Be a forgiving person and do not hold onto grudges. Do not engage in gossip, backbiting, thus guarding against your tongue. Simple acts of kindness can cultivate a compassion for other living things.

Encourage your kids to show care for others, help those in need and be kind towards all creatures of God.

Tarbiyah for Children

Without input from you, your children will not know about Tarbiyah or personal development. And without personal development, your child will not know the importance of peace in today’s chaotic world. Instill the message of peace in children at an early age.

Provide a sound Islamic foundation by investing in colorful children’s Islamic books which relate stories from the Qur’an written in simple sentences. Appeal to their creative side and engage them in craft activities and coloring pages that propel peace.

Bring the Family Together

There’s nothing like a family get-together with a big pot of food to enhance the occasion. Talking, eating and socializing with family members helps develop a better understanding of each other.

Make time to have the family over as it brings a sense of belonging, security, stability and peace.

Make it a habit to perform prayers together and try to engage in many things as a family in order to develop stronger ties and interconnection.

Remember that a strong family bonding is the base for a sound and safe society.

Be a Good Neighbor

Needless to say, your neighbors are the closest people to you in terms of distance.

Islam accords special status to neighbors, regardless of whether they are Muslim or not. You are encouraged to socialize, care for and share with them.

So, it is in your best interest to maintain peace with them so they do not become a daily source of frustration. If you are peaceful, it may just catch on and they will be contagiously peaceful too!

“Truly, in remembering God do hearts find rest.”

~ Qur’an 13:28

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