Seeking Knowledge

It has become one of the sources of social pride and the characteristics of civilized families and high classes to send their daughters without a Mahram (non-marriageable male) to study in a foreign country. They imbue this act with a religious form and say that the Prophet  said:“Seeking knowledge is an obligation upon every Muslim.” [Ibn Maajah (Al-Albaani: Saheeh)] They ignore the fact that the knowledge meant in the Hadeeth (narration) is that knowledge which draws the Muslim man and woman nearer to Allah, The Almighty; not the false knowledge which keeps them away from Him.

Some people nowadays have trespassed the limits of Sharee'ah (Islamic legislation) and give the name “knowledge” to dancing, music, singing, drama, cinema, theater, obscene stories and every means of immorality and disbelief. Moreover, they call the study of means of Riba (usury) and the sexual theories of Freud “knowledge”! They have become impudent to the extent that they claim that the obligatory knowledge meant in the Hadeeth of the Prophet  is immorality which is disguised by the slogans of knowledge.

For the sake of clearing up any confusion, the knowledge meant in the Hadeeth is what is necessary to know about religion; such as knowing the two testimonies of faith and their meaning, prayer, fasting, Zakaah (obligatory charity) for those who have the Nisaab (the minimum amount liable for Zakaat), Hajj for those who are able to perform it, the rulings of transactions and trade for those who wish to trade, rulings of Muzaara‘ah (Crop Sharing) for those who wish to embark upon this transaction; and by the same token everybody should learn the relevant Sharee'ah (Islamic legislation) knowledge in his/her field.

This kind of knowledge is called “individual obligation” that every Muslim must learn. Any additional knowledge is considered “communal obligation”, if some Muslims learn it, the others are not required to do so. When no Muslims learn it, all of them bear guilt so long as the branch of knowledge is needed. Allah, The Almighty, Says (what means): {And it is not for the believers to go forth [to battle] all at once. For there should separate from every division of them a group [remaining] to obtain understanding in the religion and warn their people when they return to them that they might be cautious.} [Quran 9:122]

After teaching the children (both boys and girls) the necessary knowledge of religion, we should bring up each group according to the needs of natural disposition. The programs of teaching boys and girls cannot be the same; otherwise, the matter would be like shoe factories whose machines produce only one model. Unifying the educational programs of boys and girls is the worst form of foolishness and ignorance. There must be a difference in educational programs so that, in the end, we would have mothers who are knowledgeable of how to raise their children and manage their homes and families. They should also have general knowledge about nursing; some of them should be specialized in this branch of knowledge in order to nurse and treat women and children. The girl should be aware of household management, sewing, needle-work and cooking. She should learn how to bring up children in a righteous manner.

These are the basics that every girl should master after knowing the necessary matters of religion. Then, it is permissible for her to know various branches of knowledge or become specialized in them if she has the ability and desire. There is a wide sphere for this matter under Sharee'ah as long as it remains within the limits of Sharee'ah and there is no intermixing between the sexes, exposing of adornments or spreading corruption and obscenity.

Dr. Alexis Carrel said that it is foolish to make the woman renounce motherhood. Therefore, girls must not have the mental and material training that the boys have. They must not be encouraged to have the same goals as boys. Mentors must exert great effort and pay attention to the physical and mental characteristics of the male and female and their natural functions. There are differences between the sexes that cannot be ignored. Therefore, it is inevitable that we take these differences into account when building a civilized world.

He also said that it is a cause of wonder that programs of girls’ education do not include any detailed study of the young and their mental and physiological characteristics. The natural function of the woman must be returned to her. This function does not include pregnancy only, but it should also include taking care of her children.

Unfortunately, educational programs for girls and boys are similar all over the world even in Arab and Islamic countries which, regrettably, blindly follow the course of the West.
The words of Dr. Carrel with regard to the similarity of educational programs offered to boys and girls and its danger to society are very important because this approach leads to attempts to obliterate the natural and biological differences between boys and girls and their ignorance of their role in life. -islamweb.net

Name Malik commonly used for boys not girls

Question

Assalaamualaikum. Is Malik a boys' and girls' name?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

The name Malik is linguistically masculine; it is exclusively used for boys and not for girls. The feminine version of the name is Malikah. This is the common usage of the name since ancient times; it is a male name given exclusively to boys.

Shaykh Ibn &699;Uthaymeen  was asked, "Some names are common to both males and females; is it permissible to give our children such common names like Walaa’ and Razaan?"

He replied, "What is this name 'Razaan'? It is known that it is used for women. Walaa’ also is used for women, and we have not heard that it is used for men. Accordingly, it is impermissible for a man to bear the name Walaa’. As for the names common to both men and women, there is no harm in bearing them because their gender is identified by the words bin (son of) or binti or bte (daughter of) after them."

The Shaykh  explained that the rationale for the impermissibility of naming males with these two names (Razaan and Walaa’) is that they are commonly used for females. The same goes for the name Malik, which is commonly used for males, so it it should not be used for females.

Allah knows best. -islamweb.net

Characteristics of righteous women - II

 ·        Tolerates harm for the sake of the religion: The wife of Qays ibn Al-Khateem, who was named Hawwaa’, converted to Islam, but he used to try to avert her from Islam and annoy her while she was prostrating by pushing her and turning her over her head. While he was at Makkah (Mecca) before Hijrah,the Prophet,  was told the news of the Ansaar (Helpers) and he was told about the wife of Qays and the harm that she had been subjected to. During the pilgrimage season, the Prophet,  met him and said: “Your wife converted to Islam and you harm her and I would like you to stop doing this!” (Al-Isaabah fi Tamyeez As-Sahaabah by Ibn Hajar 8/11064)

·        Patient during times of afflictions: Silah ibn Ashyam  participated in a battle along with his son. He said to his son, “O son! Go ahead and fight so that I seek the reward of Allah for losing you!” His son fought until he was killed, then Silah fought and he was killed as well. Women gathered around his wife, Mu‘aathah, so she said, “If you have come to congratulate me, then you are welcome, but if you have come for any other reason, then return!” (Siyar A‘laam An-Nubalaa’ by Ath-Thahabi 3/498)

·        Keen on the interest of her children: Umm Sulaym, may Allah be pleased with her, believed in the Prophet,  and her husband, Abu Anas, who had been away, returned and asked her: “Have you apostatized?” She said, “I have simply believed in this man!” She kept teaching their son, Anas, may Allah be pleased with him, how to profess the testimony of faith. Once, as she was telling him to testify that 'there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah!', his father admonished her, “Do not corrupt my son!” She said, “I am not corrupting him.” (At-Tabaqaat Al-Kubra by Ibn Sa‘d 8/425)

·        Respects her husband: The wife of Sa‘eed ibn Al-Musayyib  said,“We used to speak to our husbands in the same manner in which you speak to your commanders!” (Hilyat Al-Awliyaa’ 5/168)

·        Endeavors to serve her husband: Asmaa’ bint Abu Bakr, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “When Az-Zubayr married me, he had no property nor did he have any slave. I used to feed his horse with fodder and draw water and sew the bucket for drawing it, and prepare the dough, but I was good at baking bread. I used to carry date stones on my head from Zubayr's land which was two thirds a Farsakh (about two miles) from my house.” [Al-Bukhari 4926]

·        Shares her husband’s feelings: Once, ‘Abdullaah ibn Rawaahah, may Allah be pleased with him, shed tears and his wife shed tears as well, so he asked her, “Why do you shed tears?” She said, “I shed tears because you shed tears!” He said, “I know that I will pass by Hell (on the Siraat) and I did not know if I would survive it or not.” (Siyar A‘laam An-Nubalaa‘ by Ath-Thahabi 1/236)

·        Faithful to her husband after his death: Umm Ad-Dardaa’, may Allah be pleased with her, said to her husband, Abu Ad-Dardaa’, may Allah be pleased with him: “You proposed to me in this life and my parents married me to you and I want you to be my husband in the Hereafter!” He told her,“Then, do not get married after my death!” Mu‘aawiyah, may Allah be pleased with him, proposed to her after the death of her husband, but she refused. (Al-Isaabah Fi Tamyeez As-Sahaabah by Ibn Hajar 8/74)

·        Diligent to learn knowledge of the Sharee‘ah (Islamic legislation). Faatimah, the daughter of Shaykh ‘Alaa’ Ad-Deen As-Samarqandi  was brought up well by her father and she was a knowledgeable jurist who memorized the book that her father wrote, Tuhfat Al-Fuqahaa’. Some kings knew about what she had done; so they proposed to her, but her father refused. After this, one of the students of her father, Al-Kaasaani came and wrote Badaa’i‘ As-Sanaa’i‘, which is an explanation of the book of hisShaykh the Tuhfah, and presented it to his Shaykh As-Samarqandi. HisShaykh was very happy with this book, married him to his daughter and made this book her dowry. Her husband would sometimes make a mistake and she would correct it for him. Fatwas were passed with her approval and her father’s. After her marriage, Fatwas would have her approval, as well as her father’s, and her husband’s approval.  (Al-Fawaa’id Al-Bahiyyahby Al-Laknawi)

·        Seeks what is lawful and avoids what is prohibited: Maymoonah bint Al-Aqra‘  wanted to sell the spun yarn that she had made, so she gave to the spinner and told him, “When you sell it tell the buyer that it may not be tightly spun because I was fasting!” After that she went to the spinner and asked him to give her the spun yarn back as she was afraid that he might not tell people what she had told him. (A‘laam An-Nisaa’ by Ridha Kahaalah 5/138)

·        Calls to the way of Allah The Almighty. Umm Shareek, may Allah be pleased with her, accepted Islam when she was in Makkah, then she started going to the women of the Quraysh secretly calling them to embrace Islam until the people of Makkah discovered what she was doing. Thus, they took her and told her that they would have punished her severely, if it were not for her family and kinfolk. They returned her to her people. (Sifat As-Safwah by Ibn Al-Jawzi 2/53) -islamweb.net

READ PART 1 - Characteristics of righteous women - I

Characteristics of righteous women - I

Ziyaad ibn Abeeh the Umayyad statesman, asked those who were sitting with him, “Who leads the most blissful life?”They replied, “The Commander of the Believers does!” He said, “No. The man who leads the most blissful life is a Muslim man who is married to a Muslim woman and they have enough sustenance, and each of them is happy and satisfied with their partner! This man does not know us and we do not know him!”

Who is this woman who was admired by the most eloquent and most shrewd man among the Arabs? She is the woman who is chaste and virtuous. A woman whose face is shining with purity, whose heart shines with the glory of obedience to Allah The Almighty and whose outer appearance reflects dignity and arouses reverence. This is the woman who is faithful in dedicating her heart, emotions and thoughts to her husband. Some of the characteristics of such woman are:

·        She offers sound opinions and advice: Saffaanah bint Haatim At-Taa’i, may Allah be pleased with her, went to her brother after she met the Messenger of Allah  and started to tell her brother about Islam. Her brother asked her, “What do you think of this man?” She replied, “I think we should follow him!” [Al-Isaabah 8/108]

·        She sacrifices family and homeland for the sake of supporting the religion: Umm Kulthoom bint ‘Uqbah, may Allah be pleased with her, emigrated from Makkah (Mecca) to Madeenah for the sake of her religion while she was still a girl who had never been married. She left her father who was an evil man, comparable to a devil in human form. After that, her brothers pursued her, so she said to the Prophet, , “Would you let them take me back [in order to] turn me back from my religion, low as my endurance is and as weak as you know women are?’’ [Al-Bukhari 4/3945]

·        Hastens to do good deeds: In the following story, the female companion gave an excellent practical example of this. The Prophet,had a guest and asked his wives if they had any food, but they all said that they only had water. Hence, the Prophet, asked his Companions: “Who can host this man?” One of the Ansaar (Helpers) said that he could do that and took the guest home.

The man asked his wife to be generous with the guest of the Prophet, , but she told him that they had nothing except a little food for their children. The husband asked her to prepare the meal, light the lamp and let the children sleep if they asked for dinner. The wife prepared the meal, lit her lamp and made her children sleep. Then, she stood up pretending to mend her lamp, but she put it off. Then both she and her husband pretended to be eating before their guest, while in reality, they really went to bed hungry.

In the morning, the Ansari man went to the Messenger of Allah,  who said: “Tonight, Allah laughed or wondered at your action.” Allah The Almighty revealed the verse (which means): {But give [them] preference over themselves, even though they are in privation. And whoever is protected from the stinginess of his soul - it is those who will be the successful.} [Quran 59:9] [Al-Bukhari 3798]

·        Her chastity is beyond what minds can conceive:  Mu‘aawiyah ibn Abu Sufyaan, may Allah be pleased with him, went to his wife, Maysoon bint Bahdal, accompanied by a castrated servant. On seeing the slave, [the unveiled] wife became very anxious and asked her husband disapprovingly,“Who is he?!” Her husband comforted her by saying, “Do not worry; he is just a castrated slave.” The righteous wife replied, “Still, he is a non-Mahram (marriageable man) to me; even castration does not allow for him what Allah The Exalted has made prohibited.” She refused that the castrated slave would enter the house [while she was not wearing Hijab(Islamic covering)]. [Al-Bidaayah wa An-Nihaayah by Ibn Katheer 148/8]

·        Honors the rites ordained by Allah The Almighty: In the year sixty-five after Hijrah, Jameelah, the daughter of the governor of Mosul, performedHajj and had four hundred camels and many Hawdajs to the extent that one could not know on which one she was staying. She emancipated five hundred slaves and gave fifty thousand dresses to charity. (Siyar A‘laam An-Nubalaa’ by Ath-Thahabi)

·        Does what is right without fearing criticism: ‘Eesa ibn ‘Allaam ‘Uthmaan said, “I was at Faatimah bint ‘Ali’s house, may Allah be pleased with them both, and a man came praising her father. She took ash and threw it at his face.” [Tabaqaat ibn Sa‘ad 8/466]

·        Devout worshipper: Al-Haytham ibn Jammaaz  said, “I was married to a woman who does not sleep at night [as she would be praying all the night]. I could not stay up late with her, but she would sprinkle water and nudge me with her foot while saying, ‘Are you not shy of Allah? For how long would this snoring go on?’ (He said), By Allah! I would be ashamed of myself considering what she did.” (Ta‘theem Qadr As-Salah 2/ 835)

·        Abstinent regarding worldly temptations. Al-Waaqidi  narrated that once it was the eve of `Eed and he had nothing, so he went to one of his friends who was a merchant and borrowed one thousand dinars sealed in a bag. When he returned home, one of his friends from Bani Haashim from the family of the Prophet,  came to him and told him that he was in need. Al-Waaqidi  went to his wife and told her about this. She asked, “What will you do?” He replied, “I will give him half the money in the bag!”She said, “This is nothing! One of the family of the Prophet,  comes to you and you give him half the bag!” Therefore, Al-Waqidi gave him all the money. The merchant was a friend of this man and asked him to lend him money. The Haashimi man gave him the same bag, so he recognized it. When the ruler knew about their story, he rewarded every one of their men one thousand dinars and gave the woman four thousand dinars, and said,“She is the most generous one among you!” (Siyar A‘laam An-Nubalaa’ by Ath-Thahabi 9/467) -islamweb.net

A glimpse of Islam's great concern for women

1- When the religion of Islam was revealed to the Prophet  it was the custom of the people of the pre-Islamic era to hate and detest women. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {And when one of them is informed of [the birth of] a female, his face becomes dark, and he suppresses grief.} [Quran 16: 58]

They disdained the infant girl and would bury her alive. Islam prohibited this and insisted that she be exalted and maintained with dignity. Allah, The Almighty, Says (what means): {And when the girl [who was] buried alive is asked, for what sin she was killed.}[Quran 81: 8-9]
In some Ahadeeth, the Prophet  said:

• "Whoever maintains two daughters until they become independent will come on the Day of Resurrection along with me (close to each other) like these two (and he joined his two fingers)." [Muslim]

• "Whoever is put to trial by these daughters and he treats them kindly, these daughters will act as a shield for him from Hell." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

2- When the religion of Islam was revealed to the Prophet  it had been the habit of the people of the pre-Islamic era to prevent the woman from her share in the inheritance. Islam gave her this right, whether little or large; Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {For men is a share of what the parents and close relatives leave, and for women is a share of what the parents and close relatives leave, be it little or much - an obligatory share.} [Quran 4: 7]

3- When the religion of Islam was revealed to the Prophet  it had been the habit of the people of the pre-Islamic era to inherit women against their will. When a woman's husband died, one of the heirs would come, throw a garment over her and say, "I have inherited her just as I have inherited his wealth." This would entitle him to have more control over her than herself. Islam prohibited this. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {O you who have believed, it is not lawful for you to inherit women by compulsion.} [Quran 4: 9]

4- When the religion of Islam was revealed to the Prophet  it had been the habit of the people of the pre-Islamic era to make difficulties for their women in order to prevent them from receiving their rights. A man would prevent his divorcee from remarrying until she had returned everything he had spent on her. A father would prevent his daughter from marriage, and likewise, the brother would prevent his sister if he so willed. A man would mistreat his wife and refuse to divorce her unless she ransomed herself. Islam prevented all this and eradicated such behavior. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means):

• {And do not make difficulties for them in order to take [back] part of what you gave them unless they commit a clear immorality.} [Quran 4: 19]

• {Do not prevent them from remarrying their [former] husbands if they agree among themselves on an acceptable basis.} [Quran 2: 232]

5- When the religion of Islam was revealed to the Prophet  the woman was suffering from her husband's oppression, bad morals and ill treatment. Islam prohibited this and commanded the husband to treat her just as he would like her to treat him. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means):

• {And live with them in kindness.} [Quran 4: 19]

• {And due to the wives is similar to what is expected of them, according to what is reasonable.} [Quran 2: 228]

6- When the religion of Islam was revealed to the Prophet  the widow's ‘Iddah (waiting period after the death of her husband) was a complete year. Islam lessened it to just a third. Allah, The Exalted Says (what means): {And those who are taken in death among you and leave wives behind - they, [the wives, shall] wait four months and ten [days].} [Quran 2: 234]

7- Islam instructed that women should be treated with kindness. In a Hadeeth, the Prophet  said: "Be kind to women." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

It also forbade one to hate his believing wife. The Prophet  said:

• "A believing man should not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he would like another one." [Muslim]

• "The best of you are those who are the kindest to their wives."[At-Tirmithi]

• "This life is enjoyment, and the best of its enjoyment is a righteous wife." ` [Muslim]

While indicating the characteristics of the righteous wife, the Prophet  said: "She is the wife who pleases her husband when he looks at her, obeys him when he commands her and safeguards his honor and wealth when he is not present." [Ahmad and An-Nasaa’i]  -islamweb.net

Your faith is your key to happiness

‘Aa‘ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, was once asked, “Who is the best of women?” She answered, “She who does not use foul language, who is unaware of men’s cunningness (so she does not become their rival), and whose heart is occupied with nothing but adorning herself for her husband and caring for her children.”  

 

Know, my dear sister, that believing in Allah The Exalted is the essence of your happiness and the source of comfort and tranquillity. Indeed, misery, suffering, and constant agonies are caused by abandoning faith in Allah The Almighty, and neglecting His remembrance, thankfulness to Him, and failing to fulfil the due rights of the acts of worship. Allah The Exalted Says (what means):{“Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah the hearts are assured.”}  [Quran 13:28[H.S1] 

 

{“And whoever turns away from My remembrance – indeed, he will lead a depressed life, and We will gather him on the Day of Resurrection blind.”}[Quran 20:124]

 

A young Muslim immigrant to the USA narrates that he had worked for a wealthy businessman who owns companies there. Whenever this businessman passed by this young man, he would find him smiling and appearing happy, whereas, the employer was sad, worried and gloomy all the time. Once he asked the young Muslim man about the secret behind his smile which reflects happiness and joy. The young man simply answered him, “Because I am Muslim.” Then the businessman exclaimed, “Will I find this happiness that you feel if I embrace Islam?” The young man answered,“Yes.” Then he accompanied his employer to an Islamic Centre where he embraced Islam and then burst into tears. When he was asked about the reason why he was crying, he answered, “This is the first time in my entire life that I have experienced real happiness.” [Tareek As-Sa‘aadah (The Way to Happiness)]

 

A mother’s advice to her daughter

 

When ‘Awf ibn Muhallim al-Shaybaani, one of the most highly respected leaders of the Arab nobility during the Jaahiliyyah, (pre-Islamic era) married his daughter Umm Iyaas to al-Haarith ibn ‘Amr al-Kindi, she was made ready to be taken to the groom, then her mother, Umaamah came in to her, and advised her daughter saying,

My dear daughter, you are leaving the home in which you have been brought up and were raised, to a home which you do not know, and with a new companion who you are not accustomed to. By marrying you, he has become your guardian and superior. Therefore, be a slave to him and he will be a slave to you.  

My dear daughter, maintain these ten traits and he will always support you. As for the first and second trait: Be content in your life with him and be an obedient companion.

The third and fourth: Continuously be attentive to what his eyes fall on and to what his nose might smell. Do not let him behold you unattractive, and let him only smell pleasant scents from you.

The fifth and the sixth: Be attentive to the time of his meals, and be quiet during his sleep; for hunger is agitating, and disturbing one’s sleep arouses anger.

The seventh and eighth: Preserve his money, and look after his household and children, for guarding his money is a good characteristic, and looking after his household and children is a way of honoring him.

As for the ninth and tenth traits: Never expose his secrets or disobey his orders, for if you expose his secrets you will not be safe from his betrayal, and if you disobey his orders you will make him angry.

In addition, avoid expressing happiness while he is sad, or being gloomy while he is happy, for the first quality is an act of negligence, and the second displeases him.

Honor him the best you can, and he will honor you the best he can.

The more you agree with him, the longer he will stay in your company.

Know, that you will not attain what you aspire for unless you favor his contentment over yours, and his desires over yours whether concerning something that pleases or displeases you.

 

Steps to marital happiness

 

·        Remember that you are not a man:

 

Many wives face marital failure due to developing complexes about their femininity. Such women are not proud of their femininity, and do not acknowledge their husbands’ role of being in charge and their right to lead the family. Such women are paranoid, constantly feeling that their husbands are trying to subdue them and exercise their masculinity over them. Consequently, such a wife will try to prove that she is equal to him. These poisonous beliefs will ruin their lives and turn it into a living hell. 

 

Such a woman should know that men and women complete one another; men enjoy the qualities that women lack, and similarly, women enjoy the qualities that men lack. Men’s right to take charge over women does not mean humiliation or suppression; rather, it means leadership, responsibility, wisdom, compassion, mercy and affection. By virtue of man’s right to take charge, he can take his wife through their life journey tosafety and happiness.

 

·        Search for the positive side:   

 

Many wives do not feel happy in their marriages because of their negative perspective of their husbands; they only see their flaws and defects. Their husbands might have countless good qualities that surpass their defects, but their melancholic perspective of their life blinds them from such good traits, thus she is only able to see her husband’s weaknesses.

 

A wise wife should look for her husband’s positive traits, enumerate them, try to foster them and praise him for them. Moreover, she should be patient with his flaws and defects, and try to overlook them. Were she to confront her husband’s abuse with kindness, it would deeply affect him and perhaps drive him to change his bad behavior with her, and replace his flaws and defects with positive qualities.

 

·        Make sure of your husband’s love for you:

 

Verifying your husband’s love for you is essential for the wife to attainmarital happiness. On the one hand, a husband should affirm his love for his wife from time to time. On the other hand, a wife should remind herself of her husband’s love for her and try to find reasons which could verify that love; the first of which was his proposal to marry her in the first place which proves his attraction towards her and his love for her. Besides, the fact that he is still married to her also indicates this. Add to that, the fact that he financially supports her, tends to her, cares for her, and feels protective jealousy over her. All this highlights his love for his wife.

 

·        Your happiness lies in your contentment:

 

How many women have deprived themselves of attainingmarital happinessbecause of wishing for what others have? The wife pushes her husband to satisfy her desires by providing her with luxuries that are not necessary at all, knowing that he cannot afford that. On seeing her husband unable to provide her with what she wants, she loses respect for him and sees him as a lazy and passive person.

 

If such a wife were to judge her life fairly, she would have seen countless positive points and the bright side of the pages of her life, that can guarantee her happiness if she is content with the blessings that Allah The Exalted has bestowed upon her. In the past, the Muslim wife would stand at her porch bidding her husband farewell, as he went to work and remind him, “Fear Allah The Almighty, and beware, beware of bringing back home anything that is unlawful; we can endure hunger, but we can never endure Hell.” It is worth mentioning that a happy person is not he who gets all that he wishes for; since one’s desires cannot be fully satisfied, and wishes continue until the last breath. Actually, true happiness is found in contentment. -islamweb.net

When there is a Sick Person in Our House

Illness is a trial from Allah The Almighty, with which He, The Exalted, afflicts whomever He wills from among His servants; to test this person and purify them from any sins. The Prophet  said: "A pious Muslim's situation is amazing, for it is all good; and this is not for anyone except for the pious Muslim. If he is granted [from Allah] welfare, he is thankful and this is good for him. If he is inflicted with distress he is patient and this is good for him."[Muslim]

A member of the family may become ill and bedridden; or there may be elderly members that need special care. Cases such as these definitely require a great deal of concern and conscientiousness. A feeling of tranquility and psychological comfort are necessary in a patient's room, which is a positive factor in the process of recovery. This requires:

• Caring for the patient and supplicating Allah The Almighty that He cures him, in a way that helps the patient feel optimistic and pleased with the decree of Allah The Almighty. We supplicate for the patient by saying, "Ath-hib Al-Ba’s Rab An-Naas. Ishfi wa anta Ash-Shaafi, la Shifaa’ Illa Shifaa’uk, Shifaa’an la Yughaadiru Saqama." (Remove pain, O Lord of people. Cure for You are the Healer and there is no cure except Yours, [Your cure is] a cure that leaves no illness.) [Al-Bukhari]

• Another Du'aa (supplication) for the sick is: "Allahumma Rab An-Naas, Muth-hib Al-Ba’s, Ishfi anta Ash-Shaafi, wala Shaafi Illa ant, Ishfi Shifaa’an la Yughaadiru Saqama." (O Allah, Lord of people, Remover of pain. Heal for You are The Healer and there is no healer except You. Cure a cure that leaves no illness.) [Ahmad and Al-Bukhari]

• The lighting in the patient's room should be suitably low to give a feeling of comfort and peace. Care should be taken so that the lights do not point directly into the patient's eyes. When the patient needs sufficient lighting to be able to read, this can be provided if his condition allows it.

• Ventilation in the room should be suitable without letting the patient be exposed to strong air currents.

On opening windows to freshen the air in the room, a partition should be placed so that air currents do not directly blow towards the patient. Limiting the air flow can also be achieved by opening the windows slightly. Maintaining a constant temperature in the patient's room is also very important.

• Maintaining the room's cleanliness without upsetting the patient by taking care to use disinfectants [avoiding toxins like chorine] in the cleaning process, and trying to minimize the circulation of dust particles and noise pollution that result during cleaning.

• Having plants and flowers in the patient's room [or as a view from his window] because it provides a kind of joy and refreshment, and helps the patient to be more comfortable psychologically. Changing the arrangement of the flowers from time to time imparts a feeling of change and prevents boredom. It is important to take care to keep strongly scented flowers away from the patient's bed if his health requires that.

• Fulfilling the patient's needs and providing his requirements without him having to repeatedly request them.

• If the patient is able to serve himself, it is best to have his medications nearby within reach, on a table near o him; along with a glass of water, paper tissues, a small clock, a Quran, a book he enjoys, a small radio and so on. -islamweb.net